Ceviri Hikaye 1: Korku ve Gizem Hikayeleri--Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Böcek Avcısı Tuhaf bir deneyim mi? diye sordu doktor. Evet , dostlarım, gerçekten de çok tuhaf bir deneyim yaşadım. Böyle bir deneyimi bir daha yaşamayı ummuyorum doğrusu, çünkü bir insanın hayatında bu türden iki olayın meydana gelme olasılığı çok azdır. Bana inanıp inanmamakta özgürsünüz ama olaylar tam da anlatacağım gibi oldu. Daha yeni doktor olmuştum ama henüz çalışmaya başlamamıştım ve Gower Caddesi’nde kendime daire tutmuştum. O zamandan bu yana caddenin numarası değişti ama ev Metro İstasyonu’ndan giderken sol tarafta bombeli pencereli tek evdi. Murchison adlı dul bir kadın o sıralar evin sahibiydi ve üç tıp öğrencisi ile bir mühendisi kiracı almıştı. Ben en üst katta kalıyordum. Bu en ucuz oda olduğu halde yine de bütçemi aşıyordu. Zaten az olan birikimlerim eriyip gitmekteydi ve her hafta yapacak bir iş bulmam daha da elzem hale geliyordu. Ancak pratisyen doktorluk yapmaya gönülsüzdüm, çünkü kalbim bilimden, özellikle de güçlü bir eğilimim olan zoolojiden yana atıyordu. Artık neredeyse mücadeleden vazgeçip tıbbi angarya hayatına kendimi bırakmıştım ki, çabalarımın yön veren çok olağanüstü bir olay oldu. Bir sabah gazeteyi açmış göz gezdiriyordum. Doğru dürüst hiçbir haber yoktu ve gazeteyi elimden atmak üzereydim ki gözüm şahsi ilanlar köşesinin üst tarafındaki bir ilana takıldı. Şu şekilde kaleme alınmıştı: "Bir tıp doktorunun hizmetine bir kaç günlüğüne ihtiyaç vardır. Güçlü bir fiziğe, sağlam sinirlere ve kararlı bir yapıya sahip olması şarttır. Aynı zamanda entomolojist (böcek uzmanı) olmalıdır—koleopteristler (kınkanatlılar konusunda uzmanlar) tercih sebebidir. Başvurular şahsen ve bugün öğleden önce 77B, Brook Caddesi’ne yapılmalıdır." Deminde dediğim gibi zoolojiye çok meraklıydım. Zoolojinin bütün bölümleri içinde de böcekler beni en çok cezbeden araştırma konularıydı ve böcekler içinde de en aşina olduğum tür bokböceği idi. Kelebek koleksiyoncuları bolca bulunur ama bokböceği çok daha çeşitlidir ve bu adalarda kelebeklerden daha kolay bulunurlar. Zaten başlangıçta da bu yüzden ilgimi çekmişlerdi ve kendim de sayıları bir kaç yüzü bulan bir bokböceği çeşidi koleksiyonu yapmıştım. İlandaki diğer şartlara gelince, sinirlerimin yeterince sağlam olduğunu biliyordum ve hastaneler arası spor müsabakalarında ağırlık atma birincisi olmuştum. Açıkçası, bu iş için biçilmiş kaftandım. İlanı okuduktan beş dakika sonra bir arabaya atlayıp Brook Caddesi’nin yolunu tutmuştum. Yolda kafamda bu meseleyi evirip çevirmeye ve böylesi nitelikleri gerektiren bu garip işin nasıl birşey olduğunu tahmin etmeye çalıştım. Güçlü bir fizik, sağlam bir yapı, tıp eğitimi, bokböceği hakkında bilgili olma—bu farklı nitelikler arasında nasıl bir bağlantı olabilirdi? Ve sonra bir de bunun ilanda belirtildiği üzere geçici bir iş olması gibi hayal kırıklığı yaratıcı bir yönü vardı. Mesele üstünde ne kadar düşündüysem o kadar anlaşılmaz bir hal alıyordu; ama düşünüp taşınıp aynı yere varıyordum, ne olursa olsun kaybedecek bir şeyim yoktu, bütün kaynaklarımı tüketmiştim ve ne kadar zor olursa olsun cebime girecek bir kaç kuruş dürüst kazanılmış para için her maceraya atılmaya hazırdım. Kaybedeceklerinin bedelini ödemek zorunda olan bir adam başarısızlıktan korkar ama zaten talihin bana verebileceği hiç bir ceza kalmamıştı. Ben şansını denemesine izin verilen cebi delik bir kumarbaz gibiydim. Brook Caddesi 77B numaralı ev köhne ama yine de heybetli boz renkli ve düz duvarlıydı, Kral George dönemi mimarisinin bir özelliği olan yoğun saygınlığa ve katılığa sahipti. Arabadan inerken genç bir adamın kapıdan çıkıp caddede hızlı adımlarla yürümeye başladığını gördüm. Yanımdan geçerken bana meraklı ve sanki kötü bir bakış fırlattığını farkettim ve bunu iyiye yordum,çünkü reddedilmiş bir adaya benziyordu ve benim başvurum onu kızdırdıysa bu işe henüz kimse alınmadı demekti. Umutla geniş basamakları çıktım ve ağır kapı tokmağını vurdum. Pudralı ve özel üniformalı bir uşak kapıyı açtı. Belli ki varlıklı ve modern insanlarla muhatap olacaktım. "Evet efendim?" dedi uşak. "İlan için..." "Elbette efendim" dedi uşak. "Lord Linchmere sizi derhal kütüphanede kabul edecek." Lord Linchmere! Bu ismi hayal meyal hatırlar gibiydim ama o an onun hakkında hiçbirşey aklıma gelmiyordu. Uşağın takip ettim ve sıra sıra kitaplarla çevrili büyük bir odaya alındım. Bir yazı masasının arkasında ufak tefek temiz traşlı geriye taranmış uzun gri saçlı hoş bir adam oturuyordu. Bu adam sağ elinde uşağın uzattığı kartı tutarken beni tepeden tırnağa keskin delici bakışlarla süzdü. Sonra hoş bir gülümsemeyle "İlanıma yanıt vermek için mi buradasınız Dr. Hamilton?" diye sordu. "Evet efendim."En azından dıştan bakıldığında istediği özelliklere sahip olduğumu hissetmiştim. "İstenilen özelliklere sahip misiniz?" "Öyle olduğuna inanıyorum." "Güçlü bir adamsınız, en azından görünüşünüzden bu sonucu çıkarıyorum. "Epeyce güçlü olduğuma inanıyorum." "Aynı zamanda kararlı mısınızdır?" "Öyle sanırım." "Ani tehlikeyle burun buruna gelme duygusunu bilir misiniz?" "Hayır, bilirim diyemem." "Ama böyle bir durumda soğukkanlılığınızı koruyabileceğinizi ve çabuk davranabileceğinizi düşünüyorsunuzdur sanırım?" "Umarım öyle olur." "Umarım öyledir. Sizin için yeni olan bir durumda ne yapacağınızdan eminmiş numarası yapmadığınız için size olan güvenim daha da artıyor. İzlenimim o ki, kişisel özellikler açısından siz tam aradığım kişisiniz. Bunu hallettiğimize göre bir sonraki konuya geçebiliriz." "Bir sonraki konu?" "Bana bokböceğinden bahsetmeniz konusu." Acaba şaka mı yapıyor diye göz ucuyla baktım ama tam tersi masasının üstüne hevesle dirseklerini dayamıştı ve gözlerinde endişe olarak nitelendirilebilecek bir ifade vardı. "Korkarım bokböceği hakkında birşey bilmiyorsunuz," diye haykırdı. "Tam tesine efendim, bu hakkında birşeyler bildiğimi düşündüğüm yegane bilimsel konudur." " Bunu duyduğuma çok memnun oldum. Lütfen bana onlardan bahsedin." Konuşmaya başladım. Konuyla ilgili orijinal birşey söylediğimi iddia etmiyorum, ama bokböceğinin özelliklerini kısaca toparladım ve daha yaygın bulunan türlerin şöyle bir üstünden geçtim, kendi küçük koleksiyonumdaki örneklere ve Entomoloji Bilimi Dergisi’ne gönderdiğim “Bokböceklerini Gömmek” isimli makaleme birkaç gönderme yaptım. "Ne! Bir koleksiyoncu mu?" diye bağırdı Lord Linchmere. "Yani siz bir koleksiyoncu musunuz?" Gözleri heyecanla titriyordu. "Siz kesinlikle Londra’da amacıma uygun yegane insansınız. Beş milyon kişi içinde böyle birinin olması gerektiğini düşünmüştüm ama asıl zorluk bu kişiyi bulmaktı. Sizi bulduğum için gerçekten çok şanslıyım." Masanın üstündeki gongu çaldı ve uşak içeri girince ona “Leydi Rossiter’a lütfen buraya kadar gelmesini söyleyebilir misin," dedi lord hazretleri. Ve birkaç dakika sonra leydi odaya alındı. Lord Linchmere’a çok benzeyen aynı çabuk aceleci yüz ifadesine ve kır saçlara sahip ufak tefek orta yaşlı bir kadındı. Ancak lordun yüzünde gözlemlediğim endişe ifadesi hanımın yüzünde çok daha belirgindi. Yüzüne çok derin bir acının gölgesi düşmüş gibiydi. Lord Linchmere beni tanıştırırken Leydi yüzünü tamamen bana döndü ve sağ kaşının üzerinde uzanan yarı iyileşmiş bir yarayı görünce şoke oldum. Yara kısmen yara bantıyla kapatılmıştı ama yine de ciddi ve yeni bir yara olduğunu görebiliyordum. "Dr. Hamilton tam amacımıza uygun birisi, Evelyn," dedi Lord Linchmere. "Kendisi bir bokböceği koleksiyoncusu ve bu konuda yazılmış makaleleri var." "Sahi mi!" dedi Leydi Rossiter. "Öyleyse kocamı duymuş olmalısınız. Bokböceği hakkında biraz bilgi sahibi herkes Sör Thomas Rossiter’ı duymuş olmalıdır." İlk kez bu muamma iş hafiften aydınlanmaya başlamıştı. İşte sonunda bu insanlarla bokböceği arasında bir bağlantı kurulmuştu. Sör Thomas Rossiter bu konuda dünya çapında bir otoriteydi. Hayatını bu konuda çalışmaya adamıştı ve çok kapsamlı bir eser yazmıştı. Hemen bu eseri okuyup faydalandığımı belirterek onu rahatlattım. "Kocamla tanıştınız mı?" diye sordu. "Hayır." "Ama tanışacaksınız," dedi Lord Linchmere, kararlı bir şekilde. Leydi çalışma masasının yanında ayakta duruyordu ve elini lordun omzuna koymuştu. Yüzlerini beraber gördüğümde kardeş olduklarını açıkça anlayabildim. "Buna gerçekten hazır mısın, Charles? Bu yaptığın çok soylu bir davranış ama beni çok korkutuyorsun." Sesi endişe ile titredi ve saklamaya çalışmasına rağmen lord da eşit derecede duygulanmış görünüyordu. "Evet, evet hayatım; herşey ayarlandı, kararlaştırıldı; esasında görebildiğim kadarıyla başka yolu da yok." "Aslında bir yol var." "Hayır, hayır, Evelyn, seni asla terketmeyeceğim--asla. Herşey yoluna girecek—buna güvenebilirsin; herşey yoluna girecek ve şüphesiz böyle mükemmel bir aracı bulmamızda da Tanrı’nın eli var gibi gözüküyor ." Durumum mahçubiyet vericiydi, çünkü o an için benim varlığımı unutmuş gibi görünüyorlardı. Ama Lord Linchmere aniden bana döndü. "Sizi istediğim iş için, Dr. Hamilton, kendinizi tamamen benim hizmetime vermeniz gerekiyor. Benimle kısa bir yolculuğa çıkmanızı, hep yanımda kalmanızı ve sizden ne istersem isteyeyim size mantıksız da gelse soru sormadan yerine getirmenizi istiyorum." "Çok fazla şey istiyorsunuz," dedim. "Ne yazık ki daha açık anlatamam çünkü ben de olayların nasıl gelişeceğini bilmiyorum. Ancak emin olabilirsiniz ki sizden vicdanınızın onaylamayacağı hiçbirşey yapmanız istenmeyecek; ve size söz veririm herşey bittiğinde böyle iyi bir işe karışmış olmaktan gurur duyacaksınız." "Tabii eğer mutlu sonla biterse," dedi leydi. "Kesinlikle; eğer mutlu sonla biterse," diye yineledi lord hazretleri. "Peki şartlar nedir?" diye sordum. "Günde yirmi sterlin." Miktar beni şaşırtmıştı. Şaşkınlığım yüzüme yansımış olmalıydı. "İlk okuduğunuzda ilanda da dikkatinizi çekmiş olmalı, istenilenler hakikaten nadir bulunan özelliklerin bir karışımı," dedi Lord Linchmere; "böyle çeşitli özellikler yüksek bir karşılığı hakkedebilir ve görevlerinizin meşekkatli ve hatta tehlikeli olabileceğini sizden gizlemeyeceğim. Üstelik, bir iki gün içinde meseleyi sonuçlandırabiliriz." "Lütfen öyle olsun Tanrım!" diye iç geçirdi kızkardeşi. "Öyleyse, Dr. Hamilton, yardımınıza güvenebilir miyim?" "Kesinlikle," dedim. "Bana görevlerimin ne olduğunu söylemeniz yeterli." "İlk göreviniz eve dönmek olacak. Taşraya yapacağımız kısa bir seyahatte gerekli olabilecek bir kaç parça eşyayı toplayacaksınız. Paddington İstasyonu’ndan bu öğleden sonra saat 3:40 birlikte yola çıkacağız." "Uzağa mı gidiyoruz?" "Sadece Pangbourn’a kadar. Kitap tezgahının önünde 3:30ta buluşalım. Biletler bende olacak. Hoşçakalın, Dr. Hamilton! Ve unutmadan eğer varsa yanınızda getirirseniz çok memnun olacağım iki şey olacak. Birisi böcek toplama çantanız ve diğeri de bir sopa, ne kadar kalın ve ağır olursa o kadar iyi." Brook Caddesi’nden ayrıldıktan sonra Lord Linchmere ile Paddington’da buluşana kadar geçen süre içinde tahmin edersiniz ki düşünecek çok şeyim vardı. Bütün bu inanılmaz işler beynimin içinde kaleydeskop şekilleri halinde dönüp duruyordu. Hepsi birbirinden inanılmaz bir düzine açıklama üretiyordum. Ama içimde gerçeğin de inanılmaz olması gerektiğine dair bir his vardı. En sonunda bir çözüm bulma çabalarını bir kenara bıraktım ve almış olduğum talimatlara tam olarak uymakla yetinmeye karar verdim. Bir el çantası, örnek kutusu ve büyükçe bir baston ile Paddington’daki kitap tezgahının önünde bekliyordum ki Lord Linchmere çıkageldi. Düşündüğümden de ufak tefek bir adamdı—sabaha kıyasla daha sinirli bir tavır içindeydi. Uzun kalın ve bol bir seyahat paltosu giymişti ve elinde de sopa vardı. "Biletler bende," dedi perona yönelirken. "Trenimiz bu. Bir kompartman ayırttım, çünkü seyahat esnasında size bir kaç şey anlatmayı çok istiyorum." Ancak bana anlatacakları bir cümlede de özetlenebilirdi çünkü söyledikleri orada onu korumak amacıyla bulunduğum ve hiç bir şart altında kendisini yalnız bırakmamam gerektiği türünden hatırlatmalardı. Bunu yolculuk boyunca durmadan tekrarladı, özellikle yolculuğun sonlarına doğru gittikçe artan bir sıklıkta. Sinirlerinin harab olduğu belliydi. "Evet," dedi en sonunda sözlerimden ziyade bakışlarıma cevaben, "SİNİRLERİM BOZUK, Dr. Hamilton. Hep çekingen biri olmuşumdur ve çekingenliğim sağlığımın pek yerinde olmamasından kaynaklanmaktadır. Ama ruhum sağlamdır ve daha az heyecanlı birinin çekineceği türden bir tehlikeyle rahatlıkla yüzleşebilirim. Şu an yapmakta olduğum şey bir dürtü değil ama görev duygusundan kaynaklanıyor, yine de şüphesiz yüksek bir risk aynı zamanda. Eğer durum kötüye giderse, azizlik mertebesine yükselebilirim." Bu bitmez tükenmez bilmece okumaları artık dayanılmaz olmuştu. Buna bir son vermem gerektiğini hissettim. "Sanırım efendim eğer bana tamamen güvenirseniz çok daha iyi olur," dedim. "Nereye gittiğimizi, hedefimizin ne olduğunu görmeden etkin biçimde hareket etmek benim için imkansız." "Ha, nereye gittiğimize gelince, bu konuda gizeme gerek yok," dedi; "Delamere Court’a, eserleri ile gayet aşina olduğunuz Sör Thomas Rossiter’ın evine gidiyoruz. Ziyaretimizin tam sebebine gelince, şu aşamada size tam manasıyla açılmakla birşey kazanabileceğimizi düşünmüyorum, Dr. Hamilton. Size söyleyebilirim ki biz—biz diyorum çünkü kızkardeşim Leydi Rossiter da benimle aynı görüşte—bir aile skandalını önleme amacıyla hareket etmekteyiz. Böyle olunca da anlayacağınız kesin gerekmedikçe size açıklama yapmaktan imtina etmekteyim. Şayet sizin tavsiyenizi isteyecek olursam o başka tabii, Dr. Hamilton. Hali hazırda sizden sadece etkin yardım istiyorum ve bunu en iyi şekilde nasıl yapabileceğinizi size zaman zaman belirteceğim." Daha fazla söylenebilecek birşey yoktu ve fakir bir insan günde yirmi sterlin için epeyce şeye katlanabilirdi ama yine de Lord Linchmere bana kötü davranıyordu. Beni pasif bir alete dönüştürmek istiyordu, tıpkı elindeki sopa gibi. Bununla beraber, onunki gibi hassas bir bünye için skandalın ne kadar vahim bir durum olabileceğini tahmin edebiliyordum ve başka çare kalmadıkça bana açılmayacağını anlamıştım. Esrar perdesini çözmek için kendi gözlerime ve kulaklarıma güvenmeliydim ama onlara boşuna güvenmemem gerektiğine de inanıyordum. Delamere Court Pangbourne İstasyonu’nundan en az beş mil ötedeydi ve bu mesafeyi üstü açık bir arabada katettik. Lord Linchmere bu süre içinde derin düşüncelere dalmış bir vaziyette eve yaklaşana kadar ağzını açmadan oturdu. Konuştuğunda da beni şaşırtan bir bilgi verdi. "Belki farkında değilsiniz," dedi, "ben de sizin gibi bir doktorum" "Hayır efendim farkında değildim." "Evet, gençken diplomamı aldım. Çalışma fırsatım olmadı ama yine de eğitimin faydasını gördüm. Tıbba adadığım yıllar için hiç pişmanlık duymadım. Delamere Court’un kapısına geldik." Armalı canavarlarla süslü iki yüksek sütunun önündeydik. Canavarlar kıvrılarak uzayan geniş bir yolun girişindeydi. Defne çalılıkları ve rododendronlar üzerinden uzun sivri çatılı bir malikane görüyordum. Ev sarmaşıklarla sarılı ve eski tuğla duvarların sıcak, neşeli ve yumuşak parıltısı ile uyumlu idi. Gözlerim hala hayranlıkla bu harikulade eve kilitlenmişti ki yol arkadaşım heyecanla kolumdan çekiştirmeye başladı. "İşte Sör Thomas," diye fısıldadı. "Lütfen bokböceği hakkında bildiğiniz herşeyi anlatın." Uzun boylu, tuhaf biçimde kemikli ince bir adam defne çalılığındaki bir açıktan çıkageldi. Elinde bir çapa tutuyordu ve bahçıvan eldivenleri giyiyordu. Geniş kenarlı gri şapkası yüzünü gölgeliyordu ama bana aşırı sert bir yüz gibi geldi, bakımsız bir sakalı ve sert, alışılmamış yüz hatları vardı. Arabamız durdu ve Lord Linchmere aşağı atladı. "Sevgili Thomas, nasılsınız?" dedi içtenlikle. Ama bu içtenlik kesinlikle karşılıklı değildi. Ev sahibi kayınbiraderinin omzundan bana kızgın bakışlar fırlatmaktaydı ve ben bölük pörçük cümleler yakaladım--"iyi bilinen istekler . . . yabancılardan nefret . . . haksız müdahale . . .kesinlikle affedilemez." Sonra mırıldanılan bir açıklama geldi ve ikisi birden arabanın yanına geldiler. "Sizi Sör Thomas Rossiter’le tanıştırayım, Dr. Hamilton," dedi Lord Linchmere. "Ortak zevkleriniz olduğunu keşfedeceksiniz." Eğilerek selam verdim. Sör Thomas kaskatı duruyordu ve geniş şapkasının altından bana sert sert bakıyordu. "Lord Linchmere bana bokböceği hakkında birşeyler bildiğinizi söylüyor," dedi. "Bokböceği hakkında ne biliyorsunuz?" "Kınkanatlı hakkında sizin kitabınızdan öğrendiklerimi biliyorum, Sör Thomas," diye cevap verdim. "Britanya bokböceğinin iyi bilinen türlerinin isimlerini söyleyiniz," dedi. Bir sınav beklemiyordum ama neyseki hazırlıklıydım. Cevaplarım onu memnun etmişe benziyordu çünkü yüz hatları gevşemişti. "Kitabımdan birşeyler öğrenmişe benziyorsunuz, beyefendi" dedi. "Bu konularla zekice ilgilenen birilerini bulmak benim için nadir bir olaydır. İnsanlar spor veya cemiyet olayları gibi önemsiz şeyler için zaman ayırabiliyorlar ama böcekler hep ihmal ediliyorlar. Sizi temin ederim ülkenin bu bölgesindeki aptalların büyük bir kısmı benim bir kitap yazmış olduğumdan bile habersizler--benim, elitranın gerçek işlevini ilk tasvir eden adamın. Sizi gördüğüme memnun oldum, beyefendi ve size şüphesiz ilginizi çekecek birkaç örnek gösterebilirim." Arabaya bindi ve bizimle eve kadar geldi ve yolda bana uğur böceğinin anatomisi ile ilgili yaptığı son araştırmaları anlattı. Size daha önce Sör Thomas Rossiter’in kaşlarına inen geniş bir şapka taktığını söylemiştim. Hole girdiğinde şapkasını çıkardı ve hemen şapkanın gizlemiş olduğu bir özelliği farkettim. Zaten geniş olan alnı dökülen saçları yüzünden daha da geniş görünüyordu ve sürekli hareket halindeydi. Sinirsel bir gevşeme kasları sürekli bir spazm halinde tutuyordu ve bu da bazen tik bazen de daha önce hiç görmediğim garip bir dönme hareketine sebep oluyordu. Çalışma odasına girdikten sonra bize döndüğünde bu bariz bir biçimde görülebiliyordu ve oynayan kaşların altından bakan sert, sabit gri gözleri ile kontrast oluşturduğu için daha da çarpıcı duruyordu. "Kusura bakmayın," dedi, "Leydi Rossiter burada değil, sizi yalnız karşılamak durumundayım. Bu arada, Charles, Evelyn ne zaman döneceği hakkında birşey söyledi mi?" "Birkaç gün daha şehirde kalmak istedi," dedi Lord Linchmere. "Bilirsiniz taşrada epey vakit geçirdiklerinde hanımların sosyal yükümlülükleri artar. Kızkardeşimin pek çok eski arkadaşı şu anda Londra’da." "Eh tabii o özgür bir kadın ve planlarını değiştirmek istemem ama geldiğinde çok memnun olacağım. Burada onsuz çok yalnızım." "Ben de zaten yalnızlık çektiğinizi düşünüp geldim. Genç arkadaşım, Dr. Hamilton, uzmanı olduğunuz konu ile o kadar ilgili ki benimle gelmesinin sizin için bir sakıcası olmayacağını düşündüm." "Ben gözlerden uzak bir hayat sürüyorum, Dr. Hamilton ve yabancılardan gittikçe daha az hoşlanıyorum," dedi ev sahibimiz. "Bazen sinirlerimin de eskisi gibi sağlam olmadığını düşünüyorum. Gençken böcek peşinde sağlıksız hastalıklı yerlerde çok koşturdum. Ama sizin gibi ahbap bir koleopteriste kapım her zaman açıktır ve koleksiyonuma bir göz atarsanız çok memnun olurum, sanırım Avrupa’nın en iyi koleksiyonu olduğunu söylersem abartmış olmam." Gerçekten de öyleydi. Alçak çekmeceli büyük meşe bir dolabı vardı ve burada düzenli bir şekilde etiketlenip istiflenmiş dünyanın her yerinden gelme siyah, kahverengi, mavi, yeşil ve benekli böcekler vardı. Arada bir iğneyle sabitlenmiş böcek sıraları üzerinde elini gezdirip nadide bir örnek alıyor ve büyük bir saygı ve ihtimamla onu değerli bir dini obje gibi tutuyor ve onu nasıl bulduğunu ve ona has özellikleri sıralıyordu. Belli ki anlayışlı bir dinleyici bulmak onun için sıradışı birşeydi ve akşam geç vakitlere değin anlattı da anlattı ta ki gong çalıp akşam yemeği için giyinme anonsu yapılıncaya kadar. Bütün bu zaman zarfınca Lord Linchmere ağzını bile açmadı sadece kayınbiraderinin yanında durdu ve ben onun mütemadiyen kayınbiraderine kaçamak meraklı bakışlar fırlattığına tanık oldum. Kendi yüz hatları da güçlü duygular, endişe, anlayış ve beklenti ifade ediyordu: Hepsini okur gibiydim. Lord Linchmere’in birşeyden korktuğunu ve birşeyler beklediğini anlayabiliyordum ama ne olduğunu çıkaramıyordum. Sessiz ama keyifli bir akşam geçirdik ve Lord Linchmere’in yarattığı sürekli gerilim duygusu olmasa kendimi tamamen rahat hissedecektim. Ev sahibimize gelince, tanışıklık ilerledikçe daha sevimli bir hal aldı. Uzaktaki karısından ve daha yeni yatılı okula gönderilen küçük oğlundan sık sık sevgiyle bahsediyordu. Ev, diyordu, onlarsız aynı olmuyor. Bilimsel çalışmaları olmasa, günleri nasıl geçirebileceğini bilmediğini söylüyordu. Akşam yemeğinden sonra bilardo odasında puro içtik ve sonunda da erkenden yatmaya gittik. Ve sonra ilk defa olarak Lord Linchmere’in bir kaçık olabileceği şüphesi aklımdan geçti. Ev sahibimiz odasına çekilince arkamdan yatak odama geldi. "Doktor," dedi, alçak ve aceleci bir sesle, "benimle gelmelisiniz. Geceyi benim odamda geçirmelisiniz." "Ne demek istiyorsunuz?" "Açıklamamayı tercih ederim. Ama bu sizin görevlerinizin bir parçası. Odam sizinkine yakın ve sabah uşak sizi uyandırmadan dönmüş olursunuz." "Ama neden?" diye sordum. "Çünkü yalnız kalmaktan çekiniyorum," dedi. "İşte bu yüzden, ille de bir sebep arıyorsanız." Bu bana tam manasıyla kaçıklık gibi göründü ama yirmi sterlin pek çok itirazı susturabilirdi. Peşinden odasına gittim. "Ee...o yatakta sadece bir kişilik yer var," dedim. "Ve orada sadece bir kişi yatacak," dedi. "Ya diğeri?" "Nöbet tutacak." "Neden?" diye sordum. "Saldırıya uğrayacağınızı düşünüyor gibisiniz." "Belki de öylerdir." "Öyleyse neden kapınızı kilitlemiyorsunuz?" "Belki saldırıya uğramak İSTİYORUMDUR." Bu durum bana gittikçe daha çok delilik gibi gözüküyordu. Ancak, boyun eğmekten başka çare yoktu. Omuzlarımı silktim ve boş şöminenin yanındaki koltuğa oturdum. "Nöbeti ben tutuyorum öyleyse?" dedim hüzünle. "Geceyi aramızda bölüşeceğiz. Eğer ikiye kadar siz nöbet tutarsanız, geriye kalan kısmı ben devralırım." "Pekala." "Beni ikide uyandırın öyleyse." "Öyle olsun." "Kulaklarınızı açık tutun ve herhangi bir ses duyarsanız beni anında uyandırın—anında, tamam mı?" "Bana güvenebilirsiniz." Onun kadar ciddi görünmeye çalıştım. "Ve Tanrı aşkına uyuya kalmayın," dedi ve sadece ceketini çıkartıp yatak örtüsünü üstüne çekip uyudu. Hüzünlü bir nöbetti, özellikle de aptalca olduğunu düşündüğüm için. Lord Linchmere’in Sör Thomas Rossiter’in evinde tehlikede olduğunu düşünmek için geçerli bir sebebinin olduğunu varsaysak bile, neden kapısını kilitleyip kendisini korumuyordu?" Kendi cevabı, yani saldırıya uğramak istiyor olması gülünçtü. Neden saldırıya uğramak istesindi ki? Ve kim ona saldırmak isteyecekti? Belli ki, Lord Linchmere özel bir sanrıdan muzdaripti ve sonuç olarak ben aptal bir bahane yüzünden gece uykumdan olacaktım. Yine de, ne kadar saçma olursa olsun, onun için çalıştığım müddetçe emirlerine harfiyen uymaya kararlıydım. O nedenle, boş şöminenin yanında oturup koridordaki saatin monoton tiktaklarını ve her onbeş dakikada bir ding dong ötüşünü dinledim. Bitmek tükenmek bilmeyen bir nöbetti. Saatin tiktakları haricinde büyük eve tam bir sessizlik hakimdi. Kolumun yanında koltuğu aydınlatan küçük bir lamba duruyordu, odanın geri kalanı gölgedeydi. Yatakta Lord Linchmere sakin derin nefesler alıyordu. Onun bu sakin uykusunu kıskanıyordum. Gözkapaklarım ikidebir kapanıyordu ama her seferinde görev duygum imdadıma yetişiyordu ve dikelip gözlerimi ovuşturuyor, kendimi çimdikliyordum. Mantıksız nöbetimi sonuna kadar götürmeye kesin kararlıydım. Ve götürdüm de. Koridordan saatin ikiyi vurduğunu duydum ve omzuna dokunarak lordu uyandırdım. Anında doğruldu, yüzünde ilgi dolu bir ifade ile sordu "Bir şey mi duydunuz?" "Hayır efendim. Saat iki." "Pekala. Şimdi nöbeti ben devralıyorum. Siz uyuyabilirsiniz." Onun yaptığı gibi örtünün altına uzandım ve kısa sürede uykuya dalmışım. Son hatırladığım o lambanın ışığı ve Lord Linchmere’in endişeli yüzü ve büzülmüş oturan vücudu idi. Ne kadar uyudum bilmiyorum ama aniden kolumun çekiştirilmesi ile uyandım. Oda karanlıktı ama yoğun bir yağ kokusu bana lambanın o an söndürülmüş olduğunu söylüyordu. "Çabuk! Çabuk!" dedi Lord Linchmere'in sesi kulağıma. Yataktan fırladım. O hala kolumu çekiştiriyordu. "Bu taraftan!" diye fısıldadı ve beni odanın bir köşesine çekti. "Şişt! Dinleyin!" Gecenin sessizliğinde koridorda ilerleyen birinin ayak seslerini rahatça duyabiliyordum. Gizli, hafif ve her adımdan sonra ihtiyatla duraksayan bir adamın adımlarıydı bular. Bazen yarım dakika hiç ses gelmiyordu ve sonra tekrar harekete geçtiğini gösteren bir hışırtı ve çıtırtı geliyordu. Arkadaşım heyecandan titriyordu. Hala kolumu tutan eli rüzgarda yaprak gibi titriyordu. "Ne oldu?" diye fısıldadı. "Gelen o!" "Sör Thomas mı?" "Evet." "Ne istiyor?" "Şişşt! Ben söyleyene kadar hiçbirşey yapmayın." Birinin kapıyı zorladığını farkettim. Kapı kolu hafifçe tıngırdıyordu ve sonra ince bir ışık huzmesi gördüm. Koridorun sonunda bir yerlerde bir lamba yanıyordu ve odamızın karanlığında dışarıyı görünür kılmaya yetecek kadar ışık veriyordu. Işık yavaş yavaş genişledi ve sonra ortasında duran bir adam silueti gördüm. Çömelmiş emekliyordu ve kambur bir cüceye benziyordu. Kapı yavaşça sonuna kadar açıldı ve sonra bir anda çömelmiş adam ayağa fırladı ve odanın ortasına sıçrayan bir kaplan gibi yatağa pat pat pat üç darbe geldi. Öylesine şaşırmıştım ki hiç kıpırdamadan durup bakakaldım ta ki arkadaşımdan yardım çığlığı gelene kadar. Kapıdan sızan ışık eşyaların siluetini görmeme yetecek kadardı ve Lord Linchmere kolları kayınbiraderinin boynunda bir tazıya dişlerini geçirmiş kahramanca dayanan küçük bir av köpeği gibiydi. Uzun boylu kemikli adam çırpınıp saldırganını yakalamak için dönmeye çalışıyordu; ama diğeri arkadan onu kavramış bırakmıyor bir yandan da tiz korku dolu çığlıklar atıyor ve sanki bu çekişmede güçler dengesinin ne kadar adaletsiz olduğunu anlatmaya çalışıyordu. Hemen imdadına koştum ve ikimiz birlikte dişlerini omzuma geçirmesine rağmen Sör Thomas’ı yere devirmeyi başardık. Gençliğime, kiloma ve gücüme rağmen, çılgın debelenmesini kontrol altına almak çok zordu; ama en sonunda giydiği sabahlığın kuşağı ile ellerini bağlamayı başardık. Lord Linchmere yeniden lambayı yakmaya çalışırken ben de Sör Thomas’ın ayaklarını tutuyordum. O sırada koridordan ayak sesleri geldi ve bağrışmalara uyanmış olan kahya ile iki uşak odaya daldılar. Onların da yardımıyla yerde ağzından köpükler saçarak kötü bakışlar fırlatan tutsağımızı etkisiz hale getirmede daha fazla zorlanmadık. Yüzüne bir kere bakmak tehlikeli bir manyak olduğunu anlamak için yeterliydi. Yatağın yanı başında duran kısa ve ağır çekiç niyetinin cinayet olduğunu göstermekteydi. Biz çırpınan adamı ayağa kaldırmaya çalışırken "Şiddet kullanmayın!" dedi Lord Linchmere. "Bu heyecandan sonra bir afallama dönemi yaşayacak. Sanırım başladı bile." O konuşurken kasılmalar şiddetini yitirdi ve delirmiş adamın başı sanki aniden uykuya dalmış gibi öne düştü. Onu koridorda taşıdık ve odasında yatağına yatırdık. Derin nefes alarak bilinçsiz yatıyordu. "Siz ikiniz onu izleyin," dedi Lord Linchmere. "Ve şimdi, Dr. Hamilton, benimle odama gelirseniz skandal korkusuyla fazlaca uzun bir süre ertelediğim açıklamayı yapacağım. Ne olursa olsun, bu geceki işteki payınızdan asla pişmanlık duymayacaksınız. "Bu olayları birkaç kelime ile aydınlatabilirim," diye devam etti yalnız kaldığımız zaman. "Zavallı kayınbiraderim dünyanın en iyi insanlarından biridir, sevecen bir koca, saygıdeğer bir babadır, ancak delilik ailesinde var. Birden fazla cinayet teşebbüsünde bulundu. Bunlar hep en sevdiği insanların hayatına yapılmış teşebbüsler olduklarından daha da üzücüler. Oğlu bu tehlikeden uzaklaşması için yatılı okula gönderildi. Daha sonra kızkardeşime, yani karısına saldırdı. Onunla Londra’da tanıştığınızda gözünüze çarpmış olabilecek yaralarla kurtuldu. Anlayacağınız aklı başındayken hiç birşey hatırlamıyor ve hangi şartlar altında olursa olsun bu kadar çok sevdiği insanları incitebileceği kendisine söylense kesinlikle inanmaz. Bildiğiniz gibi böyle hastalıkların bir özelliği genellikle muzdarip olan kişiyi buna inandırmanın imkansızlığıdır. "Bizim asıl amacımız tabii ki elini kana bulamadan önce onu engelleyebilmekti ama bu zor bir konuydu. Yalnızlığına düşkün bir adamdır ve doktora gözükmeyi kabul etmezdi. Ayrıca amaçlarımız açısından doktorun da onun deliliğine ikna olması gerekmekteydi ve bu nadir zamanlar dışında sizin benim kadar aklı başındadır. Ama neyseki bu saldırılardan önce her zaman belli bazı uyarıcı semptomlar gösterir, bunlar bizi gardımızı almamız için uyaran tehlike sinyalleridir. Bunların en belirgini sizin de gözlemlemiş olmanız gereken alnındaki sinir kasılmasıdır. Bu her zaman saldırılarından üç dört gün öncesinden beliren bir semptomdur. Bu sefer ortaya çıkar çıkmaz karısı bir bahaneyle şehre geldi ve Brook Caddesi’nde benim yanıma sığındı. " Sör Thomas'ın deliliğine bir doktoru inandırma işi de bana kaldı. Bu olmadan onu kimseye zarar veremeyeceği bir yere kapatmak mümkün olmayacaktı. İlk problem evine doktor sokmaktı. Böcek merakını ve bu merakı paylaşan herkese duyduğu sevgiyi düşündüm. O nedenle ilan verdim ve şansıma tam istediğim gibi birini yani sizi buldum. Güçlü bir yardımcı şarttı çünkü biliyordum ki deliliği ancak bir cinayet teşebbüsü ile kanıtlanabilirdi ve bu teşebbüsün şahsıma yöneleceğinden emindim çünkü aklı başındayken beni çok sever sayardı. Sanırım sizin zekanız geri kalan boşlukları doldurmaya yetecektir. Saldırının gece olacağını kesin olarak bilmiyordum ama bunun daha muhtemel olduğunu düşündüm çünkü böyle vakalarda kriz nöbetleri genellikle sabahın ilk saatlerinde gerçekleşir. Ben çok heyecanlı bir insanım ama kızkardeşimin hayatından bu tehlikeyi başka nasıl savuşturabilirim bilemedim. Sanırım artık delilik raporunu imzalayacağınızı varsayabilirim. " "Şüphesiz. Ancak İKİ imza gerekli." "Benim de doktor olduğumu unutuyorsunuz. Kağıtlar şurada etajerin üstünde, eğer sizce uygunsa şimdi imzalayabilir misiniz, böylelikle sabaha hastayı göndermiş oluruz." İşte meşhur böcek avcısı Sör Thomas Rossiter’ın evine ziyaretim böyle bitmişti ve bu aynı zamanda benim şöhret basamaklarına attığım ilk adımdı çünkü Leydi Rossiter ve Lord Linchmere sadık birer dost çıktılar ve ihtiyaçları olduğunda onların yanında bulunduğumu hiç unutmadılar. Sör Thomas’ın iyileştiği söyleniyor ve hastaneden çıktı ama sanırım yine de eğer Delamere Court’da bir gece daha geçirecek olsam kapımı içeriden kilitlerdim.

Tales of Terror and Mystery By Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Tales of Mystery The Beetle-Hunter A curious experience? said the Doctor. Yes, my friends, I have had one very curious experience. I never expect to have another, for it is against all doctrines of chances that two such events would befall any one man in a single lifetime. You may believe me or not, but the thing happened exactly as I tell it. I had just become a medical man, but I had not started in practice, and I lived in rooms in Gower Street. The street has been renumbered since then, but it was in the only house which has a bow-window, upon the left-hand side as you go down from the Metropolitan Station. A widow named Murchison kept the house at that time, and she had three medical students and one engineer as lodgers. I occupied the top room, which was the cheapest, but cheap as it was it was more than I could afford. My small resources were dwindling away, and every week it became more necessary that I should find something to do. Yet I was very unwilling to go into general practice, for my tastes were all in the direction of science, and especially of zoology, towards which I had always a strong leaning. I had almost given the fight up and resigned myself to being a medical drudge for life, when the turning-point of my struggles came in a very extraordinary way. One morning I had picked up the Standard and was glancing over its contents. There was a complete absence of news, and I was about to toss the paper down again, when my eyes were caught by an advertisement at the head of the personal column. It was worded in this way: "Wanted for one or more days the services of a medical man. It is essential that he should be a man of strong physique, of steady nerves, and of a resolute nature. Must be an entomologist-- coleopterist preferred. Apply, in person, at 77B, Brook Street. Application must be made before twelve o'clock today." Now, I have already said that I was devoted to zoology. Of all branches of zoology, the study of insects was the most attractive to me, and of all insects beetles were the species with which I was most familiar. Butterfly collectors are numerous, but beetles are far more varied, and more accessible in these islands than are butterflies. It was this fact which had attracted my attention to them, and I had myself made a collection which numbered some hundred varieties. As to the other requisites of the advertisement, I knew that my nerves could be depended upon, and I had won the weight-throwing competition at the inter-hospital sports. Clearly, I was the very man for the vacancy. Within five minutes of my having read the advertisement I was in a cab and on my way to Brook Street. As I drove, I kept turning the matter over in my head and trying to make a guess as to what sort of employment it could be which needed such curious qualifications. A strong physique, a resolute nature, a medical training, and a knowledge of beetles-- what connection could there be between these various requisites? And then there was the disheartening fact that the situation was not a permanent one, but terminable from day to day, according to the terms of the advertisement. The more I pondered over it the more unintelligible did it become; but at the end of my meditations I always came back to the ground fact that, come what might, I had nothing to lose, that I was completely at the end of my resources, and that I was ready for any adventure, however desperate, which would put a few honest sovereigns into my pocket. The man fears to fail who has to pay for his failure, but there was no penalty which Fortune could exact from me. I was like the gambler with empty pockets, who is still allowed to try his luck with the others. No. 77B, Brook Street, was one of those dingy and yet imposing houses, dun-coloured and flat-faced, with the intensely respectable and solid air which marks the Georgian builder. As I alighted from the cab, a young man came out of the door and walked swiftly down the street. In passing me, I noticed that he cast an inquisitive and somewhat malevolent glance at me, and I took the incident as a good omen, for his appearance was that of a rejected candidate, and if he resented my application it meant that the vacancy was not yet filled up. Full of hope, I ascended the broad steps and rapped with the heavy knocker. A footman in powder and livery opened the door. Clearly I was in touch with the people of wealth and fashion. "Yes, sir?" said the footman. "I came in answer to----" "Quite so, sir," said the footman. "Lord Linchmere will see you at once in the library." Lord Linchmere! I had vaguely heard the name, but could not for the instant recall anything about him. Following the footman, I was shown into a large, book-lined room in which there was seated behind a writing-desk a small man with a pleasant, clean-shaven, mobile face, and long hair shot with grey, brushed back from his forehead. He looked me up and down with a very shrewd, penetrating glance, holding the card which the footman had given him in his right hand. Then he smiled pleasantly, and I felt that externally at any rate I possessed the qualifications which he desired. "You have come in answer to my advertisement, Dr. Hamilton?" he asked. "Yes, sir." "Do you fulfil the conditions which are there laid down?" "I believe that I do." "You are a powerful man, or so I should judge from your appearance. "I think that I am fairly strong." "And resolute?" "I believe so." "Have you ever known what it was to be exposed to imminent danger?" "No, I don't know that I ever have." "But you think you would be prompt and cool at such a time?" "I hope so." "Well, I believe that you would. I have the more confidence in you because you do not pretend to be certain as to what you would do in a position that was new to you. My impression is that, so far as personal qualities go, you are the very man of whom I am in search. That being settled, we may pass on to the next point." "Which is?" "To talk to me about beetles." I looked across to see if he was joking, but, on the contrary, he was leaning eagerly forward across his desk, and there was an expression of something like anxiety in his eyes. "I am afraid that you do not know about beetles," he cried. "On the contrary, sir, it is the one scientific subject about which I feel that I really do know something." "I am overjoyed to hear it. Please talk to me about beetles." I talked. I do not profess to have said anything original upon the subject, but I gave a short sketch of the characteristics of the beetle, and ran over the more common species, with some allusions to the specimens in my own little collection and to the article upon "Burying Beetles" which I had contributed to the Journal of Entomological Science. "What! not a collector?" cried Lord Linchmere. "You don't mean that you are yourself a collector?" His eyes danced with pleasure at the thought. "You are certainly the very man in London for my purpose. I thought that among five millions of people there must be such a man, but the difficulty is to lay one's hands upon him. I have been extraordinarily fortunate in finding you." He rang a gong upon the table, and the footman entered. "Ask Lady Rossiter to have the goodness to step this way," said his lordship, and a few moments later the lady was ushered into the room. She was a small, middle-aged woman, very like Lord Linchmere in appearance, with the same quick, alert features and grey-black hair. The expression of anxiety, however, which I had observed upon his face was very much more marked upon hers. Some great grief seemed to have cast its shadow over her features. As Lord Linchmere presented me she turned her face full upon me, and I was shocked to observe a half-healed scar extending for two inches over her right eyebrow. It was partly concealed by plaster, but none the less I could see that it had been a serious wound and not long inflicted. "Dr. Hamilton is the very man for our purpose, Evelyn," said Lord Linchmere. "He is actually a collector of beetles, and he has written articles upon the subject." "Really!" said Lady Rossiter. "Then you must have heard of my husband. Everyone who knows anything about beetles must have heard of Sir Thomas Rossiter." For the first time a thin little ray of light began to break into the obscure business. Here, at last, was a connection between these people and beetles. Sir Thomas Rossiter-- he was the greatest authority upon the subject in the world. He had made it his lifelong study, and had written a most exhaustive work upon it. I hastened to assure her that I had read and appreciated it. "Have you met my husband?" she asked. "No, I have not." "But you shall," said Lord Linchmere, with decision. The lady was standing beside the desk, and she put her hand upon his shoulder. It was obvious to me as I saw their faces together that they were brother and sister. "Are you really prepared for this, Charles? It is noble of you, but you fill me with fears." Her voice quavered with apprehension, and he appeared to me to be equally moved, though he was making strong efforts to conceal his agitation. "Yes, yes, dear; it is all settled, it is all decided; in fact, there is no other possible way, that I can see." "There is one obvious way." "No, no, Evelyn, I shall never abandon you--never. It will come right--depend upon it; it will come right, and surely it looks like the interference of Providence that so perfect an instrument should be put into our hands." My position was embarrassing, for I felt that for the instant they had forgotten my presence. But Lord Linchmere came back suddenly to me and to my engagement. "The business for which I want you, Dr. Hamilton, is that you should put yourself absolutely at my disposal. I wish you to come for a short journey with me, to remain always at my side, and to promise to do without question whatever I may ask you, however unreasonable it may appear to you to be." "That is a good deal to ask," said I. "Unfortunately I cannot put it more plainly, for I do not myself know what turn matters may take. You may be sure, however, that you will not be asked to do anything which your conscience does not approve; and I promise you that, when all is over, you will be proud to have been concerned in so good a work." "If it ends happily," said the lady. "Exactly; if it ends happily," his lordship repeated. "And terms?" I asked. "Twenty pounds a day." I was amazed at the sum, and must have showed my surprise upon my features. "It is a rare combination of qualities, as must have struck you when you first read the advertisement," said Lord Linchmere; "such varied gifts may well command a high return, and I do not conceal from you that your duties might be arduous or even dangerous. Besides, it is possible that one or two days may bring the matter to an end." "Please God!" sighed his sister. "So now, Dr. Hamilton, may I rely upon your aid?" "Most undoubtedly," said I. "You have only to tell me what my duties are." "Your first duty will be to return to your home. You will pack up whatever you may need for a short visit to the country. We start together from Paddington Station at 3:40 this afternoon." "Do we go far?" "As far as Pangbourne. Meet me at the bookstall at 3:30. I shall have the tickets. Goodbye, Dr. Hamilton! And, by the way, there are two things which I should be very glad if you would bring with you, in case you have them. One is your case for collecting beetles, and the other is a stick, and the thicker and heavier the better." You may imagine that I had plenty to think of from the time that I left Brook Street until I set out to meet Lord Linchmere at Paddington. The whole fantastic business kept arranging and rearranging itself in kaleidoscopic forms inside my brain, until I had thought out a dozen explanations, each of them more grotesquely improbable than the last. And yet I felt that the truth must be something grotesquely improbable also. At last I gave up all attempts at finding a solution, and contented myself with exactly carrying out the instructions which I had received. With a hand valise, specimen-case, and a loaded cane, I was waiting at the Paddington bookstall when Lord Linchmere arrived. He was an even smaller man than I had thought--frail and peaky, with a manner which was more nervous than it had been in the morning. He wore a long, thick travelling ulster, and I observed that he carried a heavy blackthorn cudgel in his hand. "I have the tickets," said he, leading the way up the platform. "This is our train. I have engaged a carriage, for I am particularly anxious to impress one or two things upon you while we travel down." And yet all that he had to impress upon me might have been said in a sentence, for it was that I was to remember that I was there as a protection to himself, and that I was not on any consideration to leave him for an instant. This he repeated again and again as our journey drew to a close, with an insistence which showed that his nerves were thoroughly shaken. "Yes," he said at last, in answer to my looks rather than to my words, "I AM nervous, Dr. Hamilton. I have always been a timid man, and my timidity depends upon my frail physical health. But my soul is firm, and I can bring myself up to face a danger which a less-nervous man might shrink from. What I am doing now is done from no compulsion, but entirely from a sense of duty, and yet it is, beyond doubt, a desperate risk. If things should go wrong, I will have some claims to the title of martyr." This eternal reading of riddles was too much for me. I felt that I must put a term to it. "I think it would very much better, sir, if you were to trust me entirely," said I. "It is impossible for me to act effectively, when I do not know what are the objects which we have in view, or even where we are going." "Oh, as to where we are going, there need be no mystery about that," said he; "we are going to Delamere Court, the residence of Sir Thomas Rossiter, with whose work you are so conversant. As to the exact object of our visit, I do not know that at this stage of the proceedings anything would be gained, Dr. Hamilton, by taking you into my complete confidence. I may tell you that we are acting--I say `we,' because my sister, Lady Rossiter, takes the same view as myself--with the one object of preventing anything in the nature of a family scandal. That being so, you can understand that I am loath to give any explanations which are not absolutely necessary. It would be a different matter, Dr. Hamilton, if I were asking your advice. As matters stand, it is only your active help which I need, and I will indicate to you from time to time how you can best give it." There was nothing more to be said, and a poor man can put up with a good deal for twenty pounds a day, but I felt none the less that Lord Linchmere was acting rather scurvily towards me. He wished to convert me into a passive tool, like the blackthorn in his hand. With his sensitive disposition I could imagine, however, that scandal would be abhorrent to him, and I realized that he would not take me into his confidence until no other course was open to him. I must trust to my own eyes and ears to solve the mystery, but I had every confidence that I should not trust to them in vain. Delamere Court lies a good five miles from Pangbourne Station, and we drove for that distance in an open fly. Lord Linchmere sat in deep thought during the time, and he never opened his mouth until we were close to our destination. When he did speak it was to give me a piece of information which surprised me. "Perhaps you are not aware," said he, "that I am a medical man like yourself?" "No, sir, I did not know it." "Yes, I qualified in my younger days, when there were several lives between me and the peerage. I have not had occasion to practise, but I have found it a useful education, all the same. I never regretted the years which I devoted to medical study. These are the gates of Delamere Court." We had come to two high pillars crowned with heraldic monsters which flanked the opening of a winding avenue. Over the laurel bushes and rhododendrons, I could see a long, many-gabled mansion, girdled with ivy, and toned to the warm, cheery, mellow glow of old brick-work. My eyes were still fixed in admiration upon this delightful house when my companion plucked nervously at my sleeve. "Here's Sir Thomas," he whispered. "Please talk beetle all you can." A tall, thin figure, curiously angular and bony, had emerged through a gap in the hedge of laurels. In his hand he held a spud, and he wore gauntleted gardener's gloves. A broad-brimmed, grey hat cast his face into shadow, but it struck me as exceedingly austere, with an ill-nourished beard and harsh, irregular features. The fly pulled up and Lord Linchmere sprang out. "My dear Thomas, how are you?" said he, heartily. But the heartiness was by no means reciprocal. The owner of the grounds glared at me over his brother-in-law's shoulder, and I caught broken scraps of sentences--"well-known wishes . . . hatred of strangers . . . unjustifiable intrusion . . . perfectly inexcusable." Then there was a muttered explanation, and the two of them came over together to the side of the fly. "Let me present you to Sir Thomas Rossiter, Dr. Hamilton," said Lord Linchmere. "You will find that you have a strong community of tastes." I bowed. Sir Thomas stood very stiffly, looking at me severely from under the broad brim of his hat. "Lord Linchmere tells me that you know something about beetles," said he. "What do you know about beetles?" "I know what I have learned from your work upon the coleoptera, Sir Thomas," I answered. "Give me the names of the better-known species of the British scarabaei," said he. I had not expected an examination, but fortunately I was ready for one. My answers seemed to please him, for his stern features relaxed. "You appear to have read my book with some profit, sir," said he. "It is a rare thing for me to meet anyone who takes an intelligent interest in such matters. People can find time for such trivialities as sport or society, and yet the beetles are overlooked. I can assure you that the greater part of the idiots in this part of the country are unaware that I have ever written a book at all--I, the first man who ever described the true function of the elytra. I am glad to see you, sir, and I have no doubt that I can show you some specimens which will interest you." He stepped into the fly and drove up with us to the house, expounding to me as we went some recent researches which he had made into the anatomy of the lady-bird. I have said that Sir Thomas Rossiter wore a large hat drawn down over his brows. As he entered the hall he uncovered himself, and I was at once aware of a singular characteristic which the hat had concealed. His forehead, which was naturally high, and higher still on account of receding hair, was in a continual state of movement. Some nervous weakness kept the muscles in a constant spasm, which sometimes produced a mere twitching and sometimes a curious rotary movement unlike anything which I had ever seen before. It was strikingly visible as he turned towards us after entering the study, and seemed the more singular from the contrast with the hard, steady, grey eyes which looked out from underneath those palpitating brows. "I am sorry," said he, "that Lady Rossiter is not here to help me to welcome you. By the way, Charles, did Evelyn say anything about the date of her return?" "She wished to stay in town for a few more days," said Lord Linchmere. "You know how ladies' social duties accumulate if they have been for some time in the country. My sister has many old friends in London at present." "Well, she is her own mistress, and I should not wish to alter her plans, but I shall be glad when I see her again. It is very lonely here without her company." "I was afraid that you might find it so, and that was partly why I ran down. My young friend, Dr. Hamilton, is so much interested in the subject which you have made your own, that I thought you would not mind his accompanying me." "I lead a retired life, Dr. Hamilton, and my aversion to strangers grows upon me," said our host. "I have sometimes thought that my nerves are not so good as they were. My travels in search of beetles in my younger days took me into many malarious and unhealthy places. But a brother coleopterist like yourself is always a welcome guest, and I shall be delighted if you will look over my collection, which I think that I may without exaggeration describe as the best in Europe." And so no doubt it was. He had a huge, oaken cabinet arranged in shallow drawers, and here, neatly ticketed and classified, were beetles from every corner of the earth, black, brown, blue, green, and mottled. Every now and then as he swept his hand over the lines and lines of impaled insects he would catch up some rare specimen, and, handling it with as much delicacy and reverence as if it were a precious relic, he would hold forth upon its peculiarities and the circumstances under which it came into his possession. It was evidently an unusual thing for him to meet with a sympathetic listener, and he talked and talked until the spring evening had deepened into night, and the gong announced that it was time to dress for dinner. All the time Lord Linchmere said nothing, but he stood at his brother-in-law's elbow, and I caught him continually shooting curious little, questioning glances into his face. And his own features expressed some strong emotion, apprehension, sympathy, expectation: I seemed to read them all. I was sure that Lord Linchmere was fearing something and awaiting something, but what that something might be I could not imagine. The evening passed quietly but pleasantly, and I should have been entirely at my ease if it had not been for that continual sense of tension upon the part of Lord Linchmere. As to our host, I found that he improved upon acquaintance. He spoke constantly with affection of his absent wife, and also of his little son, who had recently been sent to school. The house, he said, was not the same without them. If it were not for his scientific studies, he did not know how he could get through the days. After dinner we smoked for some time in the billiard-room, and finally went early to bed. And then it was that, for the first time, the suspicion that Lord Linchmere was a lunatic crossed my mind. He followed me into my bedroom, when our host had retired. "Doctor," said he, speaking in a low, hurried voice, "you must come with me. You must spend the night in my bedroom." "What do you mean?" "I prefer not to explain. But this is part of your duties. My room is close by, and you can return to your own before the servant calls you in the morning." "But why?" I asked. "Because I am nervous of being alone," said he. "That's the reason, since you must have a reason." It seemed rank lunacy, but the argument of those twenty pounds would overcome many objections. I followed him to his room. "Well," said I, "there's only room for one in that bed." "Only one shall occupy it," said he. "And the other?" "Must remain on watch." "Why?" said I. "One would think you expected to be attacked." "Perhaps I do." "In that case, why not lock your door?" "Perhaps I WANT to be attacked." It looked more and more like lunacy. However, there was nothing for it but to submit. I shrugged my shoulders and sat down in the arm-chair beside the empty fireplace. "I am to remain on watch, then?" said I, ruefully. "We will divide the night. If you will watch until two, I will watch the remainder." "Very good." "Call me at two o'clock, then." "I will do so." "Keep your ears open, and if you hear any sounds wake me instantly--instantly, you hear?" "You can rely upon it." I tried to look as solemn as he did. "And for God's sake don't go to sleep," said he, and so, taking off only his coat, he threw the coverlet over him and settled down for the night. It was a melancholy vigil, and made more so by my own sense of its folly. Supposing that by any chance Lord Linchmere had cause to suspect that he was subject to danger in the house of Sir Thomas Rossiter, why on earth could he not lock his door and so protect himself?" His own answer that he might wish to be attacked was absurd. Why should he possibly wish to be attacked? And who would wish to attack him? Clearly, Lord Linchmere was suffering from some singular delusion, and the result was that on an imbecile pretext I was to be deprived of my night's rest. Still, however absurd, I was determined to carry out his injunctions to the letter as long as I was in his employment. I sat, therefore, beside the empty fireplace, and listened to a sonorous chiming clock somewhere down the passage which gurgled and struck every quarter of an hour. It was an endless vigil. Save for that single clock, an absolute silence reigned throughout the great house. A small lamp stood on the table at my elbow, throwing a circle of light round my chair, but leaving the corners of the room draped in shadow. On the bed Lord Linchmere was breathing peacefully. I envied him his quiet sleep, and again and again my own eyelids drooped, but every time my sense of duty came to my help, and I sat up, rubbing my eyes and pinching myself with a determination to see my irrational watch to an end. And I did so. From down the passage came the chimes of two o'clock, and I laid my hand upon the shoulder of the sleeper. Instantly he was sitting up, with an expression of the keenest interest upon his face. "You have heard something?" "No, sir. It is two o'clock." "Very good. I will watch. You can go to sleep." I lay down under the coverlet as he had done and was soon unconscious. My last recollection was of that circle of lamplight, and of the small, hunched-up figure and strained, anxious face of Lord Linchmere in the centre of it. How long I slept I do not know; but I was suddenly aroused by a sharp tug at my sleeve. The room was in darkness, but a hot smell of oil told me that the lamp had only that instant been extinguished. "Quick! Quick!" said Lord Linchmere's voice in my ear. I sprang out of bed, he still dragging at my arm. "Over here!" he whispered, and pulled me into a corner of the room. "Hush! Listen!" In the silence of the night I could distinctly hear that someone was coming down the corridor. It was a stealthy step, faint and intermittent, as of a man who paused cautiously after every stride. Sometimes for half a minute there was no sound, and then came the shuffle and creak which told of a fresh advance. My companion was trembling with excitement. His hand, which still held my sleeve, twitched like a branch in the wind. "What is it?" I whispered. "It's he!" "Sir Thomas?" "Yes." "What does he want?" "Hush! Do nothing until I tell you." I was conscious now that someone was trying the door. There was the faintest little rattle from the handle, and then I dimly saw a thin slit of subdued light. There was a lamp burning somewhere far down the passage, and it just sufficed to make the outside visible from the darkness of our room. The greyish slit grew broader and broader, very gradually, very gently, and then outlined against it I saw the dark figure of a man. He was squat and crouching, with the silhouette of a bulky and misshapen dwarf. Slowly the door swung open with this ominous shape framed in the centre of it. And then, in an instant, the crouching figure shot up, there was a tiger spring across the room and thud, thud, thud, came three tremendous blows from some heavy object upon the bed. I was so paralysed with amazement that I stood motionless and staring until I was aroused by a yell for help from my companion. The open door shed enough light for me to see the outline of things, and there was little Lord Linchmere with his arms round the neck of his brother-in-law, holding bravely on to him like a game bull-terrier with its teeth into a gaunt deerhound. The tall, bony man dashed himself about, writhing round and round to get a grip upon his assailant; but the other, clutching on from behind, still kept his hold, though his shrill, frightened cries showed how unequal he felt the contest to be. I sprang to the rescue, and the two of us managed to throw Sir Thomas to the ground, though he made his teeth meet in my shoulder. With all my youth and weight and strength, it was a desperate struggle before we could master his frenzied struggles; but at last we secured his arms with the waist- cord of the dressing-gown which he was wearing. I was holding his legs while Lord Linchmere was endeavouring to relight the lamp, when there came the pattering of many feet in the passage, and the butler and two footmen, who had been alarmed by the cries, rushed into the room. With their aid we had no further difficulty in securing our prisoner, who lay foaming and glaring upon the ground. One glance at his face was enough to prove that he was a dangerous maniac, while the short, heavy hammer which lay beside the bed showed how murderous had been his intentions. "Do not use any violence!" said Lord Linchmere, as we raised the struggling man to his feet. "He will have a period of stupor after this excitement. I believe that it is coming on already." As he spoke the convulsions became less violent, and the madman's head fell forward upon his breast, as if he were overcome by sleep. We led him down the passage and stretched him upon his own bed, where he lay unconscious, breathing heavily. "Two of you will watch him," said Lord Linchmere. "And now, Dr. Hamilton, if you will return with me to my room, I will give you the explanation which my horror of scandal has perhaps caused me to delay too long. Come what may, you will never have cause to regret your share in this night's work. "The case may be made clear in a very few words," he continued, when we were alone. "My poor brother-in-law is one of the best fellows upon earth, a loving husband and an estimable father, but he comes from a stock which is deeply tainted with insanity. He has more than once had homicidal outbreaks, which are the more painful because his inclination is always to attack the very person to whom he is most attached. His son was sent away to school to avoid this danger, and then came an attempt upon my sister, his wife, from which she escaped with injuries that you may have observed when you met her in London. You understand that he knows nothing of the matter when he is in his sound senses, and would ridicule the suggestion that he could under any circumstances injure those whom he loves so dearly. It is often, as you know, a characteristic of such maladies that it is absolutely impossible to convince the man who suffers from them of their existence. "Our great object was, of course, to get him under restraint before he could stain his hands with blood, but the matter was full of difficulty. He is a recluse in his habits, and would not see any medical man. Besides, it was necessary for our purpose that the medical man should convince himself of his insanity; and he is sane as you or I, save on these very rare occasions. But, fortunately, before he has these attacks he always shows certain premonitory symptoms, which are providential danger-signals, warning us to be upon our guard. The chief of these is that nervous contortion of the forehead which you must have observed. This is a phenomenon which always appears from three to four days before his attacks of frenzy. The moment it showed itself his wife came into town on some pretext, and took refuge in my house in Brook Street. "It remained for me to convince a medical man of Sir Thomas's insanity, without which it was impossible to put him where he could do no harm. The first problem was how to get a medical man into his house. I bethought me of his interest in beetles, and his love for anyone who shared his tastes. I advertised, therefore, and was fortunate enough to find in you the very man I wanted. A stout companion was necessary, for I knew that the lunacy could only be proved by a murderous assault, and I had every reason to believe that that assault would be made upon myself, since he had the warmest regard for me in his moments of sanity. I think your intelligence will supply all the rest. I did not know that the attack would come by night, but I thought it very probable, for the crises of such cases usually do occur in the early hours of the morning. I am a very nervous man myself, but I saw no other way in which I could remove this terrible danger from my sister's life. I need not ask you whether you are willing to sign the lunacy papers." "Undoubtedly. But TWO signatures are necessary." "You forget that I am myself a holder of a medical degree. I have the papers on a side-table here, so if you will be good enough to sign them now, we can have the patient removed in the morning." So that was my visit to Sir Thomas Rossiter, the famous beetle- hunter, and that was also my first step upon the ladder of success, for Lady Rossiter and Lord Linchmere have proved to be staunch friends, and they have never forgotten my association with them in the time of their need. Sir Thomas is out and said to be cured, but I still think that if I spent another night at Delamere Court, I should be inclined to lock my door upon the inside.

T.S.Eliot Naming of Cats

The naming of cats is a difficult matter, It isn't just one of your holiday games; You may think at first I'm mad as a hatter When I tell you a cat must have three different names. First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,Such as Victor, or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey-- All of them sensible everyday names. There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames;Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter--But all of them sensible everyday names.But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular,A name that is peculiar, and more dignified,Else how can hekeep up his tail perpendicular,Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,Such as Munkustrap, Quazo or Coripat,Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellyrum-- Names that never belong to more than one cat.But above and beyond there's still one name left over,And that is the name that you will never guess;The name that no human research can discover--But The Cat Himself Knows, and will never confess.When you notice a cat in profound meditation,The reason, I tell you, is always the same:His mind is engaged in rapt contemplationOf the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name: His ineffable effableEffanineffableDeep and inscrutable singular Name.

--------------------------------------

This is my cat Bilbo, a.k.a. Bilbo Bey because he is a very grave gentleman. His full name is Bilbo Baggins Boduroglu if you're not into the brevity thing. It's Bombili Bilbom Bilibilibom or Boboli in a playful mode. He is my pride and joy. He's been my house companion for the last six years. T.S.Eliot is right. It is a very tricky matter to name cats. When I first met Bilbo, he was a squeaky, mousy, little fellow with exceptionally pointed ears. Despite his appearance, I named him after my favorite poet Dante. After a few weeks, though, I realized he was being overwhelmed by this weighty name, so I felt compelled to change it to Tolkien's hairy, lovable, playful, adventurous character Bilbo in the Lord of the Rings.

translated poems 5--T.S.Eliot

Rhapsody on a Windy Night Twelve o’clock. Along the reaches of the street Held in a lunar synthesis, Whispering lunar incantations Dissolve the floors of memory And all its clear relations, Its divisions and precisions. Every street-lamp that I pass Beats like a fatalistic drum, And through the spaces of the dark Midnight shakes the memory As a madman shakes the dead geranium. Half-past one, The street-lamp sputtered, The street-lamp muttered, The street-lamp said, ‘Regard that woman Who hesitates toward you in the light of the door Which opens on her like a grin. You see the border of her dress Is torn and stained with sand, And you see the corner of her eye Twists like a crooked pin.’ The memory throws up high and dry A crowd of twisted things; A twisted branch upon the beach Eaten smooth, and polished As if the world gave up The secret of its skeleton, Stiff and white. A broken spring in a factory yard, Rust that clings to the form that the strength has left Hard and curled and ready to snap. Half-past two, The street-lamp said, ‘Remark the cat which flattens itself in the gutter, Slips out its tongue And devours a morsel of rancid butter.’ So the hand of the child, automatic, Slipped out and pocketed a toy that was running along the quay. I could see nothing behind that child’s eye. I have seen eyes in the street Trying to peer through lighted shutters, And a crab one afternoon in a pool, An old crab with barnacles on his back, Gripped the end of a stick which I held him. Half-past three, The lamp sputtered, The lamp muttered in the dark. The lamp hummed: ‘Regard the moon, La lune ne garde aucune rancune,[1] She winks a feeble eye, She smiles into corners. She smooths the hair of the grass. The moon has lost her memory. A washed-out smallpox cracks her face, Her hand twists a paper rose, That smells of dust and eau de Cologne, She is alone With all the old nocturnal smells That cross and cross across her brain.’ The reminiscence comes Of sunless dry geraniums And dust in crevices, Smells of chestnuts in the streets, And female smells in shuttered rooms, And cigarettes in corridors And cocktail smells in bars. The lamp said, ‘Four o’clock, Here is the number on the door. Memory! You have the key, The little lamp spreads a ring on the stair. Mount. The bed is open; the tooth-brush hangs on the wall, Put your shoes at the door, sleep, prepare for life.’ The last twist of the knife. [1] The moon does not hold grudges. --------------------------------------------------- RÜZGARLI BİR GECEDE RAPSODİ T.S. Eliot Gece yarısı. Sokağın kuytu köşelerinde Ay sentezine tutulmuş Ay büyüleri fısıldayarak Çözülür hafızanın döşemeleri Ve bütün belirgin ilişkileri, Bölümleri ve köşeleri. Önünden geçtiğim her sokak lambası Ölüm mangasının davulu gibi çalar Ve gece yarısı hafızayı silkeler Karanlığın mekanlarından Bir delinin ölü sardunyaları silkelemesi gibi. Saat bir buçuk, Sokak lambasının dili dolaştı, Sokak lambası geveledi, Sokak lambası dedi ki, ‘Bak o kadına Sırıtır gibi sızan ışıkta Kapının aralığından Sana mütereddit kadına. Göreceksin Kadının elbise eteğinin Yırtık ve kumlanmış olduğunu Ve göreceksin göz kenarının Eğri bir toka gibi kıvrıldığını.’ Hafıza Eğri büğrü bir yığın öte beriyi Öğürüp atar; Kumsalda eğri bir dal Dalgalar cilalamış atmış, pürüzsüz Sanki dünya elevermiş gibi İskeletinin sırrını, Katı ve beyaz. Bir fabrika avlusunda kırık bir yay. Gücün bıraktığı şekle pas yapışır Sert, kıvrık ve ikiye ayrılmaya hazır. Saat iki buçuk, Sokak lambası dedi ki, ‘Kanalizasyon deliğinde arazi olmuş kediye dikkat, Dili dışarıda, ekşimiş yağı bir lokmada yutar.’ Ve çocuğun eli aniden uzandı İskelede yuvarlanan oyuncağı cebe attı. O çocuğun gözlerinde hiçbir şey göremedim. Sokakta gözler gördüm Işıklı panjurların arasından İçeriye bakmaya çalışan Ve bir yengeç, bir öğleden sonra, bir havuzda, Yaşlı bir yengeç, sırtına yapışmış deniz kabukları, Ona uzattığım sopanın ucunu kavrayıverdi. Saat üç buçuk, Lambanın dili dolaştı, Lamba karanlıkta geveledi. Lamba mırıldandı: ‘Aya bak, Ay kin tutmaz, Göz kırpar belli belirsiz, Köşelere gülümser. Çimlerin saçını okşar. Ay hafızasını kaybetmiş. Soluk bir çiçek bozuğu yüzü Kadın elinde buruşturur kağıttan gülü Toz ve bayat losyon kokan. Tek başına Beyninin içinde mekik dokuyan Bütün eski gece kokuları ile baş başa.’ Hatırlama Güneşsiz kuru sardunyalardan Ve dip bucak tozdan gelir, Sokaktaki kestaneler gibi kokar Ve panjurları kapalı odalardaki kadınlar gibi Ve koridorlardaki sigaralar gibi Ve barlardaki kokteyller gibi kokar. Lamba dedi ki, ‘Saat dört, İşte kapının üstündeki numara. Hafıza! Anahtar sende, Küçük lambanın halkası sahanlığı aydınlatır. Yukarı çık. Yatak açık; diş fırçası duvarda asılı, Ayakkabılarını kapıya koy, uyu, hayata hazırlan.’ Bıçağın son bükümü.

translated poems 4--Emily Dickinson

-829- Ample make this bed Ample make this bed Make this bed with Awe In it wait till Judgment break Excellent and Fair. Be its Mattress straight- Be its Pillow round- Let no Sunrise’ yellow noise Interrupt this Ground- ------------------- Geniş yap bu Yatağı- Bu yatağı Huşu ile yap- Bekle içinde kıyamet kopana dek Mükemmel ve Dürüst. Şiltesi düzgün olsun- Yastığı yuvarlak- Gün doğuşunun sarı gürültüsü Bozmasın buranın rahatını- 2004

translated poems 3--W.H. Auden

Musee des Beaux Arts About suffering they were never wrong, The Old Masters: how well they understood Its human position; how it takes place While someone else is eating or opening a window or just walking dully along; How, when the aged are reverently, passionately waiting For the miraculous birth, there always must be Children who did not specially want it to happen, skating On a pond at the edge of the wood: They never forgot That even the dreadful martyrdom must run its course Anyhow in a corner, some untidy spot Where the dogs go on with their doggy life and the torturer’s horse Scratches its innocent behind on a tree. In Brueghel’s Icarus, for instance: how everything turns away Quite leisurely from the disaster; the ploughman may Have heard the splash, the forsaken cry, But for him it was not an important failure; the sun shone As it had to on the white legs disappearing into the green Water; and the expensive delicate ship that must have seen Something amazing, a boy falling out of the sky, Had somewhere to get to and sailed calmly on. ----------------------------------------- Güzel Sanatlar Müzesi Acı çekme hakkında hiç yanılmadılar Eski Resim Ustaları: Nasıl da iyi anladılar İnsanlık durumunu; ızdırabın nasıl meydana geldiğini Başka birisi yemek yerken ya da pencere açarken ya da öyle aylak aylak yürürken; Yaşlılar saygıyla, tutkuyla, mucizevi doğumu beklerlerken, Bunun olmasını özellikle istemeyip, Ormanın kenarında bir gölette paten yapan bazı çocuklar nasıl da hep bulunur: Onlar asla unutmadılar Dağınık bir köşecikte Köpeklerin köpek gibi yaşayıp gittiği ve işkencecinin atının Masum kıçını bir ağaca kaşıttığı yerde O feci kendini feda edişin bile zamanını nasılsa dolduracağını. Brueghel’in İkarus tablosunda olduğu gibi örneğin: nasıl da her şey Felakete sırtını döner rahatça, Çiftçi suya bir şeyin düştüğünü ve o acı çığlığı duymuş olabilir, Ama bu onun için önemli bir başarısızlık değildir; Güneş parıldar Yeşil sularda kaybolan beyaz bacakların üstünde Ve pahalı narin gemi muhtemelen müthiş bir şeye tanıklık etmiştir, Gökten düşen bir oğlan çocuğuna, Yine de sukunetle yelken açar gitmesi gereken yerlere. 2004

translated poems 2--Wallace Stevens

Of Mere Being The palm at the end of the mind, Beyond the last thought, rises In the bronze decor, A gold-feathered bird Sings in the palm, without human meaning, Without human feeling, a foreign song. You know then that it is not the reason That makes us happy or unhappy. The bird sings. Its feathers shine. The palm stands on the edge of space. The wind moves slowly in the branches. The bird’s fire-fangled feathers dangle down. --------------------------- Salt Oluşa Dair Aklın sonundaki palmiye, Son düşüncenin de ötesinde, Bronz dekordan yükselir, Altın tüylü bir kuş Palmiyede İnsani anlamdan arınmış, insani duygudan arınmış, Yabancı bir şarkı söyler. O zaman bilirsin, Akıl değildir bizi mutlu ya da mutsuz kılan. Kuş şakır. Tüyleri parıldar. Palmiye uzayın ucunda durur. Rüzgar eser dallarında usulca. Kuşun alev almış tüyleri Sarkar, düşer. 2004

translated poems 1--William Butler Yeats

Crazy Jane Talks to the Bishop I met the Bishop on the road And much said he and I. “Those breasts are flat and fallen now, Those veins must soon be dry; Live in a heavenly mansion, Not in some foul sty.” “Fair and foul are near of kin, And fair needs foul,” I cried. “My friends are gone, but that’s a truth Nor grave nor bed denied, Learned in bodily lowliness And in the heart’s pride.” “A woman can be proud and stiff When on love intent; But Love has pitched his mansion in The place of excrement; For nothing can be sole or whole That has not been rent.” Deli Jane Piskoposla Konuşur Piskoposla karşılaştım yolda Epeyce laf ettik ben de o da. “O göğüsler küçülmüş ve sarkmış şimdi, O damarlar elbet yakında kurur; Cennet mekanında yaşa, Kokuşmuş bir ağılda değil.” “Güzel ve kokuşmuş akrabadır birbiri ile, Ve güzel kokuşmuşa ihtiyaç duyar,” Diye bağırdım ben. “Arkadaşlarım göçtü ama bu dediğim Ne mezarın ne yatağın İnkar edemeyeceği bir gerçektir, Tensel alçalmışlıkla Ve kalbin gururu ile öğrenilen.” “Bir kadın mağrur ve katı olabilir Aşka meğilli ise eğer; Ancak Aşk malikanesini Dışkının mekanına kurmuştur, Çünkü hiçbirşey Olamaz tam veya yarım Önce yırtılmadıkça.” 20 Aralık 2004

Sample Cause and Effect Essay

Cause and Effect Essay MIGRATION TO BIG CITIES Migration from rural areas or small towns to big cities is more often than not involuntary, because people have traditional and sentimental attachments to their places of living. Their ancestors, family home and childhood memories tie them down to one place all their life, even for generations, if possible. However, political conflicts, unemployment and a general desire for a better life sometimes force people out of their hometowns into the metropolises. They leave their memories, heirlooms and a bit of their heart in search of a bright future for their children. Many towns and villages are still completely deserted in eastern Anatolia despite the relocation efforts of the government. In the course of the last three decades, some places have turned into ghost towns on account of PKK troubles. Locals have been driven out, forced to evacuate their village under suspicion of aiding and abetting PKK militants. The same happened to Kurds in northern Iraq persecuted by the Saddam regime. Stuck between a rock and a hard place, they chose defection which is a type of forced migration. The political unrest inevitably takes its toll on the economy. Basically, the economic repercussions of political and social strife is lack of investments on the part of the entrepreneurs who choose to invest their money in safer regions or simply banks rather than risk it in the troubled eastern and southeastern Turkey. In the nearly complete absence of industrial enterprises, the only alternative way of making a living is agriculture and animal farming. However, farming is not exactly a lucrative business either. It requires expensive machinery, fertilizers, chemical supplements and pesticides, seeds and animal feed among other necessities all of which also depend on well-trained farmers to operate and manage. Government subsidies for agriculture are hardly sufficient incentives to keep farmers in business. Government is also the biggest buyer, but usually at such low prices that barely enable farmers to sow again the following year. In the local markets, there is no guarantee that they will find buyers. Moreover, by the time their produce find its way to our street market, it goes through a long chain of middlemen who make the real profit instead of the rightful owners of that produce i.e. the farmers who put a lot of effort and money into harvesting them. So, even though unemployment is a common socio-economic problem around the country, it is especially rampant in the countryside. This results in people placing their hopes of finding employment in big cities. The types of employment to be found in cities are either menial, unskilled work in small to middle enterprises or office work demanding qualified personnel. For the latter, a high school diploma is a minimum requirement. A college degree is always preferable these days, though. Since most universities, especially the good ones are located in big cities, people desiring a better future for their children feel compelled to move to big cities to prepare them for a university education which can be achieved after long years of cumulative study. By going to school in big cities like Istanbul, Ankara and Izmir, students can have a better chance of a place in a reasonably good university. So although displacement is a very traumatic experience for almost everybody, and life in big cities is no picnic due to metropolitan problems such as over-crowdedness, traffic, high cost of living, high crime rate and environmental pollution, migration may sometimes seem to be the best option in the face of certain hardships that rural life entails.

Inquisition Bibliography

BIBLIOGRAPHY Armstrong, Karen. A History of God. London: Vintage Books, 1993, 1999. Aquinas, Thomas. Selected Writings. London: Penguin Books, 1998. Augustine, St. City of God. London: Penguin Books, 1972, 1984. ------------. Confessions. Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1991, 1992. Babinsky, Ellen Louise. “The Use of Courtly Language in Le Mirouer des simples ames Anienties.” The Internet Webpage. Baigent, Michael, and Leigh, Richard. The Inquisition. London: Penguin Books, 1999, 2000. Berlinerblau, Jacques. “Toward a Sociology of Heresy, Orthodoxy.” History of Religions, 40, no. 4 (May 2001): 327. Biddick, Kathleen. “Becoming Ethnographic: Reading Inquisitorial Authority in the Hammer of Witches.” The Internet Webpage. Blackburn, David. The Marpingen Visions. London: Fontana Press, 1993. Boyer, Paul and Nissenbaum, Stephen. Salem Possessed. Cambridge, Mass.: Harvard University Press, 1974, 2001. Brogan, Nicole. “The Cathars.” The Internet Webpage. Burman, Edward. The Inquisition The Hammer of Heresy. New York: Dorset Press, 1984. Bynum, Caroline Walker. Fragmentation and Redemption Essays on Gender and the Human Body in Medieval Religion. New York: Zone Books, 1992. Catholic Encyclopedia. “Albigenses.” The Internet Website. --------------. “Beguines and Beghards.” The Internet Website. --------------. “Heresy.” The Internet Website. --------------. “Inquisition.” The Internet Website. Cohn, Norman. Europe’s Inner Demons. St Albans: Paladin, 1976. Davison, Ellen Scott. Forerunners of Saint Francis. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Company, 1927. Delumeau, Jean. Catholicism Between Luther and Voltaire: A New View of the Counter- Reformation. Philadelphia: Westminster Press, 1977. DeMayo, Thomas Benjamin. “Mechthild of Magdeburg’s Mystical Eschatology.” Journal of Medieval History 25, no. 2 (1999) : 87-95. Duby, Georges. (ed.) A History of Private Life. Vol.2 Cambridge, Mass.: The Belknap Press of Harvard University Press, 1988, 1999. Ferrazzi, Cecilia. Autobiography of an Aspiring Saint. Chicago: Chicago University Press, 1996. Foucault, Michel. Discipline and Punish The Birth of Prison. New York: Vintage Books, 1979. ---------. History of Sexuality. London: Penguin Books, 1976, 1990. Given, James. Inquisition and Medieval Society Power, Discipline, and Resistance in Languedoc. Ithaca and London: Cornell University Press, 1997. Hamilton, Bernard. The Medieval Inquisition. New York: Holmes & Meier, 1981, 1989. Haverkamp, Alfred. Medieval Germany. Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1988, 1990. Hollywood, Amy. The Souls As Virgin Wife Mechthild of Magdeburg, Marguerite Porette and Meister Eckhart. Indiana: University of Notre Dame Press, 1995, 2001. Hufton, Olwen. The Prospect Before Her A History of Women in Western Europe. New York: Alfred A. Knopf, 1996. Jansen, Katherine L. “Mary Magdalen and the Mendicants: The Preaching of Penance in the Late Middle Ages.” Journal of Medieval History 21 (1995) 1-25. Jonas, Hans. The Gnostic Religion. Boston: Beacon Press, 1958, 1991. Kamen, Henry. The Spanish Inquisition. London: Phoenix Press, 1997. Knowles, David. The Evolution of Medieval Thought. London: Longmans, 1962. Kramer, Heinrich, and Sprenger, James. The Malleus Maleficarum. New York: Dover Publications, 1971. Knuth, Elizabeth T. “The Beguines.” The Internet Webpage, 1992. Ladurie, Emmanuel Le Roy. Montaillou. London : Penguin Books,1978, 1990. Lambert, Malcolm. Medieval Heresy Popular Movements from the Gregorian Reform to the Reformation. 2nd ed. Oxford: Blackwell Publishers, 1977, 1996. Lea, Henry Charles. History of the Inquisition of the Middle Ages. 3 vols. New York: Macmillan, 1922. Leff, Gordon. Heresy I Later Middle Ages The Relation of Heterodoxy to Dissent c. 1250-c.1450. vols 1-2. Manchester: Manchester University Press, 1967. ---------. Medieval Thought. London: Penguin Books, 1958. Lerner, Robert E. The Heresy of the Free Spirit in the Later Middle Ages. Berkeley: University of California Press, 1972. Little, K. Lester. Religious Poverty and the Profit Economy in Medieval Europe. Ithaca: Cornell University Press, 1978. Maycock, A. L. The Inquisition. London: Harper and Brothers, 1927. McGinn, Bernard. (ed.) Meister Eckhart and the Beguine Mystics. New York: Continuum Publishing Company, 1994, 2001. --------------. “The Changing Shape of Late Medieval Mysticism.” Church History 65 (June 1996) : 197-219. Mechthild of Magdeburg. The Flowing Light of the Godhead. New York: Paulist Press, 1998. Medieval Sourcebook. “Bernard Gui: Inquisitorial Technique.” The Internet Website. ------------. “Bernard Gui : Inquisitor’s Manual.” The Internet Website. ------------. “Fourth Lateran Council: Canon 3 on Heresy 1215.” The Internet Website. ------------. “Inquisition.” The Internet Website. ------------. “Na Prous Boneta.” The Internet Website. ------------. “The Rule of the Franciscan Order.” The Internet Website. Meister Eckhart. Selected Writings. London: Penguin Books, 1994. Moi, Toril. Sexual/Textual Politics Feminist Literary Theory. London: Routledge, 1985, 1990. Moore, R.I. The Formation of a Persecuting Society Power and Deviance in Western Europe 950-1250. Oxford: Blackwell Publishers, 1987, 1990. Ozment, Steven E. The Reformation in the Cities. New Haven and London: Yale University Press, 1975. Pagels, Elaine. Adam, Eve and the Serpent. New York: Vintage Books, 1989. --------. Origin of Satan. New York: Vintage Books, 1995. Pegg, Mark Gregory. The Corruption of Angels The Great Inquisition of 1245-1246. New Jersey: Princeton University Press, 2001. ----------. “On Cathars, Albigenses, and Good Men of Languedoc.” Journal of Medieval History 27 (2001) : 181-195. Peters, Edward, ed. Heresy and Authority in Medieval Europe. Philadelphia: University of Pennsylvania Press, 1980. --------. The Inquisition. Berkeley: University of California Press, 1988. Porette, Marguerite. The Mirror of Simple Souls. Indiana: University of Notre Dame Press, 1999. Ricouer, Paul. The Symbolism of Evil. Boston: Beacon Press, 1967. Robinson, Joanne Maguire. Nobility and Annihilation in Marguerite Porete’s Mirror of Simple Souls. New York: State University of New York Press, 2001. Runciman, Steven. The Medieval Manichee A Study of the Christian Dualist Heresy. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 1960. Scarry, Elaine. The Body in Pain The Making and Unmaking of the World. Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1985. Stalcup, Brenda. (ed.) The Inquisition. San Diego: Greenhaven Press, 2001. Southern, R. W. Western Society and the Church in the Middle Ages. London: Pengun Books, 1970. Sullivan, Karen. “Inquisitorial Origins of Literary Debate.” Romanic Review 88 (January 1997) : 27-51. Thomas, Keith. Religion and the Decline of Magic. London: Penguin Books, 1971, 1991. Tuchman, Barbara W. A Distant Mirror The Calamitous 14th Century. New York: Ballantine Books, 1979. Wakefield, Walter L. Heresy, Crusade and Inquisition in Southern France 1100-1250. Berkeley: University of California Press, 1974. ------------and Evans A. P. (eds.) Heresies of the High Middle Ages Selected Sources. New York: Columbia University Press, 1969, 1991. Weber, Max. The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitalism. New York: Charles Scribner’s Sons, 1958.

THE MEDIEVAL INQUISITION AND TWO BEGUINE MYSTICS: MARGUERITE PORETTE AND MECHTHILD OF MAGDEBURG Marguerite Porette from France and Mechthild of Magdeburg from Germany whose visionary books The Mirror of Simple Souls and The Flowing Light of the Godhead, respectively, survived to this day and carry striking similarities in terms of imagery, symbolism and thematic patterns. Ironically, the books led to Porette’s burning at the stake together with her book whereas Mechthild got away with just being branded as a borderline heterodoxical mystic. A Brief History of the Inquisition As a word, inquisition derives from the Latin ‘inquisitio’ which means ‘inquiry’. So, the term inquisition refers to a judicial technique carried out by inquisitors assigned by the pope to inquire into heresy in a specific area. It was Pope Gregory IX who instituted it. Inquisition, as an institution, owes its existence to the Roman Catholic Church, which was the one and only church in medieval times, and its objective of creating an ecumenical church uniting all western Christendom under one dogma or set of orthodox beliefs. The inquisition was a set of mobile ecclesiastical tribunals rather than an established organization. The beginning of the inquisition coincides with 1230s. By the end of the thirteenth century, it was in full blast. It started in 1231 by the order of Pope Gregory IX in order to suppress a particular heresy, the Catharism. This was the first inquisition, and it is called the Medieval Inquisition. It was the culmination point of earlier attempts at extirpating Cathars, “the best-organized and most dangerous of the various heretical movements existing in western Europe in the thirteenth century” in Bernard Hamilton’s words. When Cathars were wiped out by the 14th century, the Inquisition continued to operate by persecuting other groups such as witches and sorcerers as well as the Knights Templar, who were crusaders that went astray in the eyes of the Church. They were charged with corruption and hoarding wealth concealed from the Church. They later developed links with the Freemasons. The inquisition was employed mostly in southern France and northern Italy. The inquisitors were mostly chosen from friars among the mendicant orders of Franciscans and Dominicans, because they were thought to be “pious, educated and highly mobile”. The earlier attempts of the Papacy to establish the inquisition with bishops failed because bishops were elder men with settled ways. They were not equipped to wander from village to village in mountaneous places in pursuit of heretics. The Franciscan and Dominican friars, on the other hand, adopted an apostolic way of life, refused to own property or wealth both individually and communally, begged for their bread and imitated the life and teachings of Jesus Christ and preached his teachings wherever they went. So, they were perfect for the job. This was shaky ground indeed, because the Church itself had enormous wealth and prided itself on the richness of its ceremonies, rituals and attires. However, because of the devotion of these friars to the orthodox church dogma and to the Pope, they proved to be very useful for the Church and became its police and judge. Ironically, many other orders or sects with very similar ideas and ways of life came to be persecuted by the Franciscans and Dominicans. The Dominican Order, or the Order of Preachers, was established by a Castilian nobleman and priest, St Dominic Guzman. The order was licensed by Honorius III in 1217. The Franciscan Order was established by St Francis Bernadone of Assisi and was licensed by Innocent III. The friars worked with local bishops but were authorized directly by and accountable only to the Pope. The sentences they issued were predominantly penances such as wearing clothes with crosses on them, or going on pilgrimages. Initially, the aim was not necessarily to punish the heretics but rather to find them out, make them confess their erroneous ways and repent so that they can be gained back to the Church. A comparatively small number of cases ended up in execution. Heretics who refused to confess and repent and those who lapsed into heresy after reconciliation were handed over to the civil authorities and burned at the stake. However, the second variety of the inquisition, namely the Spanish Inquisition, established in 1478 by Ferdinand and Isabella and sanctioned by Pope Sixtus IV in order to persecute mainly Jews, had a stable organization led by Torquemada, the infamous Inquisitor General of Spain. This was an independent organization initiated by Pope Sixtus IV in 1478. Propelled by the religious zealotry of the Spanish crown, King Ferdinand V and Queen Isabella, the Spanish Inquisition targeted mainly conversos or New Christians, that is to say Jews who had to convert to Catholicism as the only alternative to being expelled from the country without their wealth or without the promise of welcome in another country. Faced with the danger of extinction, some chose to be baptized, but this time they were discriminated against and finally persecuted with the suspicion of judaizing, or lapsing into their old faith. This organization survived till the beginning of the nineteenth century. The third variety of the inquisition was the Roman Inquisition, or the Holy Office, established in 1542 by Pope Paul III to fight the Reformation, or the new and very extensive heresy of Protestantism in Italy. It tried to find out “suspects” who included even bishops and cardinals. Cardinal Carafa, who later became Pope Paul IV, was the ardent leader of this organization. The first Index of Forbidden Books came out in this period (1559). It was the Holy Office who put people like Galileo and Bruno on trial. The fervent persecutions and executions of the inquisition went on until the 19th century and continued its existence under the title of the Congregation of the Holy Office issuing and updating an Index of Forbidden Books until 1960s blacklisting many modern European writers. Today, it still nominally exists as the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith to give opinions on theological questions. Heresy Going back to the issue of creating dogma that went hand in hand with heterodoxy and heresy, we can say that Christian dogma was in the making from the time of St Paul, consolidated along the way with the teachings of prominent church fathers such as St Augustine and church councils such as the Council of Nicea in 325 because from its beginning, Christianity had to deal with dissenting opinions in the absence of a solid system or dogma. Dogma could only develop, of course, as problems arose with arguments challenging the traditional reading and interpretation of the Scriptures. That is to say, first you need established, orthodox dogma in order to have heresy that dissents and threatens its established opinions. However, these dissenting opinions were not always very threatening. Appropriately, the name heresy, hairesis in Greek, etymologically means only a choice, or a chosen belief. Later, it came to mean any deviation from the prescribed Church teaching. Some of the early heresies that forced the Church to come up with written formulas of the Christian creed were Arianism, Pricillianism, Manicheanism, Nestorianism and Donatism. The serious threat came with the Catharism from the twelfth century onwards. It had theological links with Manicheanism and Bogomilism, which originated in Bulgaria. Bogomils or Bougres were also dualistic. Actually, they were only nominally Christian, because they rejected the Church and its sacraments such as baptism, marriage, and eucharism (communion) accusing them of being the creation of the Devil or the Evil God and His manifestations. Like the Manicheans, they were dualists in that they believed there were two realities, or worlds, created by two gods. The Evil God, or the Devil, created and resided over the physical world and all kinds of bodily acts such as eating meat, having sex, and getting married whereas the Good God created the spiritual realm. Cathars sympathizers were only supposed to show a simple adherence to Christ’s teachings and lead a poor way of life devoted to prayer. Their baptism was not performed with holy water but with laying on of hands by the Cathari priests or perfecti. The popular appeal of the Cathars among ordinary people in much of western Europe, especially France and Italy, can be attributed to two main factors: 1.) ordinary people were not expected to lead an austere, strict life. They could go to church, receive communion, make confession, get baptized, get married, eat meat and so on. The strict lifestyle was only reserved for the perfecti. Ordinary people just received consolamentum, which literally means comforting, or last rites just before they died, which duly concerned the Church very much because this meant many Catholics died as heretics. 2.) The medieval church was not theologically well-equipped. The parish priests in towns were mostly very ignorant or corrupt, so they could not catechize (give religious instruction to) their congregation in the proper church creed. Most people were not in the habit of regularly going to church unless, by chance, there was an occasional visit from the bishop of their diocese. So, people were hungry for any religious instruction that was readily satisfied by the Cathar priests and bishops. Cathar practices are very well documented in Emmanuel LeRoy Ladurie’s seminal work on Languedoc Montaillou . Another medieval heresy, the Waldensians were not as obtrusive and different from general Christian creed as the Cathars and therefore survived until today even though they were also persecuted from time to time. They were also known as the Poor Men of Lyons. Later, they took the name of their founder Peter Waldo (or Valdes). They condemned the corruption in the Church, simplified their worship, rejected the authority of priesthood and certain sacraments and practices such as infant baptism and the veneration of the saints and martyrs. In other words, they were reformers. They were adopted by (Jan) John Hus and his followers known as the Hussites during the Renaissance period preparing the way for the Reformation. Before the inception of the Inquisition, through several Papal Bulls, the Church tried to suppress heresy with the help of the secular authorities and bishops. However, this did not work, because secular authorities, together with mobs of people, took the liberty of persecuting suspected heretics themselves without having recourse to an interrogation or a trial and simply burned them. This practice increased in alarming proportions especially in the northern parts of Europe. Another extreme was the lax attitude of authorities, as well as that of ordinary people, towards heretics in the south, especially in France. The Church was not happy with either case and wanted to exert its authority, because after all, this was ecclesiastical territory: The State should not have acted alone. Moreover, it went against the real aim of the Church since it primarily wanted to gain those heretics back to the Christian faith as dictated by the Church and save their souls. However, if the state officials killed them first, naturally salvation was not possible. Also, the opposite reaction, that of tolerating heretics for various reasons, like having liasons with them, angered the Church, which wanted assistance from the kings and lords in eradicating heresy. To facilitate their assistance, Pope Innocent III specified the punishment for heretics in his Bull called Vergentis in senium in 1199, allowing secular lords to confiscate the lands of the heretics. So when that failed, the Church decided to mobilize bishops to seek out and investigate heresy in their dioceses. Pope Lucius III issued a Bull in 1184 called Ad abolendam for this purpose. However, this failed as well, because bishops were busy men dealing with worldly stuff like managing estates, and they had no intention of trudging along towns to find out heretics. In 1209, what is also known as the Albigensian Crusade was launched against them in Languedoc by the sanction of Pope Innocent III after he was sufficiently annoyed with the failure of his peaceful methods that ended with the assassination of one of his legates probably on orders from the Count of Toulouse. The crusade lasted for twenty years. Even though it was not totally successful in terminating the heresy of Catharism, it still managed to persecute and burn many cathars without ever giving them a chance to recant. A council was gathered to discuss matters of orthodoxy and the definition of heresy as well as how to punish heretics. This was the Fourth Lateran Council which assembled in Rome in 1215 and was the biggest of its kind. It was totally representative of the Latin Christendom, and consequently, its decisions were binding. It codified the much needed orthodoxy, which was a prerequisite to define heresy. It required all adult Catholics to attend church, make confession to their parish priest, and receive Holy Communion once a year in Easter. The plan was to single out heretics who would refuse to comply with these practices. Canon III dictated that all heretics who refused to repent should be excommunicated and handed over to secular authorities who would confiscate their property and burn them at the stake. If someone was suspected of heresy, but not convicted, they had to prove their innocence by supplying a number of witnesses who would swear to their orthodoxy. If they could not do this within a year, their heresy would be considered proven. Within twenty years of the Council, secular authorities in parts of western Europe, where heresy posed a threat, adopted the decrees of the Council. But still, the question of who was to enforce those decrees remained because of the ineffectiveness of bishops as inquisitors since they were neither mobilized nor equipped to deal with the theological challenges presented by the volatile nature of the heretic ideas. The solution presented itself as was mentioned before with the foundation of two Mendicant Orders: the Dominicans and the Franciscans. Dominicans, who were specifically trained in theology for the instruction of the laity neglected by ignorant local clergy or greedy friars, seemed to be a perfect choice as inquisitors in Languedoc, where they participated under the leadership of their founder St Dominic Guzman in the campaign to restore faith among hereticated inhabitants of the region before and during the Albigensian Crusade. Franciscans were not initially as equipped as Dominicans in matters of theology since their founder St Francis of Assisi emphasized following the Gospels verbatim for guidance rather than pursuing rigorous doctrinal study. However, Gregory IX, who had licensed the Order, wanted to make use of them, too as inquisitors along with Dominicans. Thus, they set to work in Languedoc in 1233 and inquired into heresy until 1324. Bernard Gui’s Manual and the Beguines The discourse of persecution reflected in the Inquisitors’ Manuals, which were written for the benefit and guidance of young inquisitors, is very interesting. Manuals written in a solemn, judiciary style are really intriguing. Bernard Gui, as an experienced inquisitor, seemed to be the obvious choice to begin with. Moreover, it is fascinating that some friars belonging to mendicant orders very similar to, and sometimes just a branch of the Franciscans or Dominicans, came to be considered heretics whereas the Franciscans and Dominicans themselves became their inquisitors. Why does this happen? And how did those friars pose a threat to the Roman Church? Beguines, like the Spirituals and the Fraticelli, were an example of such mendicants. So, I will specifically look at that part of Bernard Gui’s Manual dealing with the Beguines. Lastly, I would like to talk about a case of a Beguine woman, called Na Prous Boneta, who was tried and sentenced by the Inquisition. The original sentence is cited in Lea‘s work. Heresy is defined as “a theological opinion or doctrine held in opposition to the ‘catholic’ or orthodox doctrine of the Catholic Church” according to OED. So, in order to exist, heresy had to wait until there emerged a concrete body of orthodox doctrines. By definition, heresy could not exist without a corresponding set of doctrines and that only came about with Thomas Aquinas whose Summa Theologica and Summa contra Gentiles formed the doctrinal basis of the Church. It would not be wrong to say that his work is still influential today. In the thirteenth century, two major heresies that the Inquisition went after were the dualist Cathars and the Waldensians or the ’poor men of Lyons’. Other important heresies started to emerge with the foundation of the mendicant orders. Pope Innocent III approved of the foundation of the Franciscan order. It quickly became popular and similar groups appeared such as the Spirituals, the Fraticelli, the heresy of the free spirit and the Beguines. The common property of all these mendicant groups was that they were based on the poverty principle. The friars lived in ascetic poverty imitating the life of Christ and trying to amend the abuse and luxury they observed in the Church. In time, a division occurred in the Franciscan Order. Some friars followed the poverty principle to the letter after the fashion of their zealous leader, St Francis of Assisi. They came to be called the ‘spirituals’. Whereas more mellow followers of the order came to be known as the ‘community‘. They were leading an active life of preaching and aiding the church in stamping out heresy. The dichotomy between these two groups within the order became severe and led to some Italian spirituals’ imprisonment. Moreover, Peter John Olivi, a leader of spirituals also known as the Beguines was persecuted in southern France. Pope John XXII supported the community against the spirituals. When the spirituals refused to conform, they instantly became heretics. This is one of the most interesting phenomena related to the whole question of heresy and the legitimacy of the Inquisition; the seemingly haphazard labeling of one group orthodox and the other heretical, in the same organization. However, it is not so arbitrary after all if it is looked at from the vantage point of obedience or disobedience, conformity or non-conformity to the wishes and whims of the powers that be, in this case the Church and the Popes. They must have perceived the obstinately rigid followers of the poverty principle as a direct threat to their snug, luxurious way of carrying on with their office. Since the Church and the Pope as the omnipotent agent of religious and social life in the Middle Ages determine the discourse in the Foucauldian sense of what is acceptable, canonized and orthodox or simply the ‘good’ and what is not acceptable, heretical, heterodoxical and uncanonized or simply the ‘bad’, some friars instantly become candidates for the stake. Now let us look at some of them, namely, the Beguines more closely. The etymology of the name Beguine is not just “to beg” but also probably “to pray”. They were a sect with close affinities with the Spirituals who were a part of the Franciscan order. In fact, they called themselves “poor brothers of penance of the third order of Saint Francis” . They were mostly seen in Provence, Toulouse, Beziers, Carcasonne and Narbonne. They based their doctrines on Brother Peter John Olivi’s writings such as Lectura super Apocalipsim. His apocalyptic vision suited the mood of the times perfectly. St Francis was representative of a new and more spiritual age for him. Interestingly, there were many women in the order. They were poor widows or orphan daughters of Crusaders. They lived communally in ‘houses of poverty’ or Beguinages. Some did manual work, some begged. All Beguines were against personal as well as common property. Marked by their ecstatic visionary experiences, they were sometimes accepted and honored as mystical, like St Mechthild of Magdeburg’s, the writer of The Flowing Light of the Godhead, and were sometimes persecuted as heretical and burned at the stake as in the case of Marguerite Porette, the writer of the Mirror of Simple Souls. The Beguines in southern France were not only persecuted for their reluctance to conform to the mainstream ’community’ of the Franciscans but also for their support of the Spirituals and for aiding them to run away from the Inquisition. They were finally wiped out by the Inquisition in the 1340s. Inquisitors and Their Manuals Inquisitors are essential to the existence and legitimization of the Inquisition, and they try to do their best by setting down their experience and wisdom on paper for the benefit of other and younger inquisitors. St Raymond of Penafort wrote his Directory in 1242 for the inquisitors in Barcelona. Bernard of Caux and John of St Pierre wrote their Processus inquisitionis in1244 for the inquisitors in Narbonne. Another famous example of such guide books is Malleus Maleficarum by Heinrich Kramer and James Sprenger written in 1488. We will be concerned here with Bernard Gui, though. He was a famous Dominican inquisitor who got this office in Toulouse in 1307, twenty-eight years after he joined the order. He became a bishop in 1324. Bernard Gui’s Manual was finished in around 1323, but he continued to work on it continuously. It has five parts. The first three are concerned with inquisitorial procedure. The fourth part contains documents such as papal bulls and aims to establish the inquisitor’s authority. In the last part, Gui deals with different types of heresies. His work actually entitled Practica officii inquisitionis heretice pravitatis (The Conduct of Inquiry Concerning Heretical Depravity) was printed by Douais in 1886. Nicholas Eymeric, the Inquisitor in Aragon followed suit and his Directorium Inquisitorum, fashioned after Gui’s manual, written in approximately 1360, became very popular. Gui employs a traditionally juridical approach in his manual. He has a deliberately serene but unmistakably partial and judgmental tone. He keeps using such adjectives and noun and adjective phrases for the Beguines as “blinded, insane heretics, masters of error rather than disciples of truth, seduced by their own imagination, schismatic, temerarious, believers of insane fables.” He itemizes the long section on Beguines in this fashion: First comes a general introduction where he identifies Beguines in their historical context. Then he talks about their “pestiferous errors and erroneous opinions” by associating them with their leader Brother Peter John Olivi. Next, he elaborates on their life style and refers to their “houses of poverty” as the “school of the Devil”. Although they read not only the works of Olivi, but also “the commandments, the articles of faith, legends of the saints, and the Summa of Vices and Virtues”, Gui believes this is just a cover-up and an “imitation of the school of Christ” because it is done “in secret and by simple laypersons” instead of being performed by the clergy and in the Church. The fourth section deals with “the outward signs by which they can be recognized to some extent”. Here, we learn about their special way of greeting one another, sitting and praying a certain way in church. In the following long section, we are given a detailed account of the Beguine doctrines. Here, Gui goes over the basic tenets of the Beguines item by item and relates how they accept the poverty rule of St Francis very astutely, how anyone who goes against this rule becomes a heretic since it is identical with contradicting the Gospel of Christ, how Pope John XXII became a heretic and even Anti-Christ in their eyes by issuing Quorumdam which allows Brothers Minor, or the community of the order of the Franciscans, to store wheat and wine for the future and thus breaking the rule of poverty. This serious charge against the Pope alone is enough to make them eligible for the stake, of course. They are consequently said to deny the sacraments given by the Pope and his church and look upon their brothers who died for their beliefs as martyrs and Olivi as an “uncanonized holy father”. They are charged with calling the Roman Church “carnal” as opposed to their “spiritual and evangelical” church. Then comes the examination and questioning process and the specific questions to be asked the contemporary Beguines. Gui advises his successors to use a manner of examination “fitting the specific case at hand” so that “the truth will more subtly and more easily be discovered, while deceit will more quickly be detected”. This is followed by what to do with the “cunning and malice” of obstinate heretics who do not cooperate with the examiner. Here, he refers to their refusal to inform on their friends based on the gospel principle of not harming their friends and neighbors. To him, understandably, this telling on friends and neighbors is nothing against the gospels. Just the contrary, he sees it as righting the wrongs, revealing the truth and reconciling with the path of the righteous and the godly. He recommends that other inquisitors should make the heretics swear to “tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth” which is horrifyingly similar to the discourse of the modern judicial system. The ninth section gives the format of two types of sample excommunication sentences. For the sentence of excommunication, there is a grace period to see whether the heretic repents, and if not, the sentence becomes permanent. Afterwards, the secular authorities take over the case. A copy of the sentence is available to the accused upon request. “Advice concerning the guile and deceit of those who, not wanting to reply clearly and lucidly, do so ambiguously and obscurely” and some other information on the veneration of Brother Olivi by the Beguines conclude the part of his manual on the Beguines. Na Prous Boneta Na Prous Boneta is considered “an inspired prophetess” among the Beguines. She was persecuted, imprisoned and later released in 1315. She was tried again because of her visions in 1325 by the inquisitor of Carcasonne, Henry de Chamay, and was consequently burned at the stake. In the eleven-page-long translation of the statement of Na Prous Boneta given to a notary for the Inquisition, it is possible to witness a heart-wrenchingly sincere and lucid account of a devout woman’s mystical vision. We first learn that she is the daughter of Durand Bonnet, she comes from the parish of Saint-Michel de la Cadiere in the diocese of Nimes and that she lived in Montpellier since she was seven. She gets arrested with the suspicion of being a member of the heretical group Beguines and is imprisoned at Carcasonne. Her testimony is taken on August 6, 1325 in which she talks about her mystical experience that started in the church of the Franciscans in Montpellier. Jesus Christ appears to her in an abundance of bright light and overwhelms her. She is resembled by Jesus to the Virgin Mary and John the Baptist. Even though she humbly protests at such a high comparison, she comes to gradually accept her role as the carrier of the Holy Spirit. She wants to share all this wonderful experience with others but hesitates at first. Finally she confides in some male friends. She gets to be persecuted because of her frank expression of her visions. Otherwise, probably no one would be able to detect her, but she does not try to avoid persecution or death since she is very much exalted in her mystical experience. She goes on to talk about the nature of divinity in compliance with the teachings of Beguines and Olivi. She is apparently very well-versed in all the doctrines of the Beguines. She is clearly under the influence of the apocalyptic vision of Brother Olivi since she refers to the dawn of the Third Age when the Everlasting Gospel is promised to her. She says Elijah is St Francis and Enoch is Olivi. According to her, the papacy lost its jurisdiction and therefore most of the sacraments also lost their significance except those of matrimony and penance since it can function without the aid of external intervention. She is very compassionate towards lepers and Spirituals who were burned at the stake. She likens them to innocent masses killed by King Herod. She fearlessly and rapidly answers her examiners. It is obvious that she is not afraid of death, and in the end, she willingly accepts her fate. Her testimony and sentence provide a very typical inquisitorial procedure and demonstrate a case of what is called “an obstinate, unrepentant heretic” by the Inquisition. Or from a different perspective, here is a heroic woman who is ready to die for what she believes in. In looking at Christian dogma-making-in-progress before, during and a little after the thirteenth century in the form of papal bulls, councils, and preaching by the mendicant orders as well as some of the inquisitors’ manuals and interrogation records of the inquisition, especially two beguines, one French and one German, came under detailed scrutiny. Their cases have generated a great deal of scholarly interest. That is namely because the cases of Marguerite Porette and Mechthild of Magdeburg, two visionary women, burned at the stake and accepted as a mystic, respectively. They both had highly personalized as well as stylized mystical visions, strikingly similar in many respects, which they described in The Mirror of Simple Souls and The Flowing Light of the Godhead, respectively. The books demonstrate the oddly whimsical nature of the latter author’s being labeled as canonical, or at least borderline heterodoxy, versus the former author’s being labeled a heretic, deserving nothing less than public immolation. The history of the Inquisition is fascinating not only because it testifies to the very complicated dynamics between religion and culture/society but also because it is a faithful reflection of all the perversities, cruelties, atrocities, intolerance, obsessions, devotions, and tendencies of self-sacrifice that human beings are capable of. Also as a long enduring judicial institution, it provides us with excellent sources of information in its archived documents about the otherwise would-be-obscure daily life and customs of pre-modern society, thus proving invaluable to social/cultural historians of diverse schools such as those of the Annales and microhistorians/local historians. Historians of mentalities or ideas have a lot to thank the Inquisition for, as well.